Audrey Podrey

Looks Like Hollowman

2011-09-05T03:04:00.003+10:00

I'm exhausted from doing nothing all week. RMIT has a weird mid semester break. Its in the middle of nowhere.

Anyhoo... I just read the blog of a gorgeous human being. People who help people are so sweet. Its like a little box instantly gets a tick in it when you see someone helping someone else.

I probably say gorgeous too much. And asshole to.

Kah Shin thinks I met a man who looks like hollowman that's some scary shit. I thought he looked perfectly fine, I still think he looks perfectly fine. Silly silly me I didn't take a picture.

I think (of course among a few other obvious things) honesty and courage get you what you want. If you lie but you talk big, you're a prick, if you tell the truth but no one hears you, that's just not gonna get you anywhere.

So Many Technical Difficulties

2011-07-22T16:21:00.003+10:00

Too many technical difficulties have occurred this year!

First I upgrade my phone plan from my sad E71 to a Blackberry, and it takes 2 months for the goddamn plan to rollover while Kah Shin who also upgraded to a Blackberry a week after I did, only waited till her next rollover date to start the new plan.

Then I get annoyed with 3 cos they're stupid and lousy so when Vodafone calls me up and offers to swap me over to Vodafone, I say yay. But then they take more than a month to transfer the line and it takes me 97 visits to Voda stores to get it fixed.

Now I've placed 2 orders with Asos 3 days apart, one for me and one for Bob (Bob's order being the later order) and then Bob's order goes and arrives first. WTFFFFF.

Big sigh.

Trading

2011-07-15T11:00:00.003+10:00

I hope my new piercing won't hinder me from getting a job working with children.

*crosses fingers*

Trading awesome things for a Bob.

Genuine Disappointment

2011-07-05T21:59:00.003+10:00

Constantly checking my reflection out in a strategically placed mirror cos I look like a fucking legend.

No actually I just keep looking at my new nose piercing. *wiggles eyebrows*

That's right I finally did it. Pierced my bloody nose. But please don't tell people. I LOVE the look of pure and utter genuine disappointment on people's faces when they see it. Its priceless.

Why Homosexuality Should Be Banned

2011-06-22T00:11:00.005+10:00

This is wicked.

Why Homosexuality Should Be Banned (link)

Sarcasm at its highest value.

Of Photographs With People In Them

2011-06-17T03:25:00.002+10:00

I'm really bored. Supposed to be studying but eh, procrastinating on Fb. And you know what, I realised something - that Asians deliberately put pictures of themselves with Caucasian people as their profile pictures.

Once more western glorification. Of course now I hear you accusing me of glorifying them too cos my boyfriend's white and I can't stand the Asiany things Asians do. Let me clear that up for you, I don't go around exclusively dating Caucasians (ask all the Indians, Chinese and one Malay I dated), and second, I like Asian people, but I don't like how they do certain things that they shouldn't be doing and then make a bad name for ALL of us Asians.

Ok so back to profile pictures. I'm sure that makes sense if they're your friend and you hang out with them a lot and you guys are pretty close. But someone you met once, twice, thrice? At a bar, at a club, at a party? Are you that friendly with them that you want to grant them the honour of being in your profile picture? Or is it just cos they're exotic? Ok maybe I just practice a different set of norms when it comes to Facebook etiquette, but apparently its a competition of how many non-Asian people you know. Yup that's right, just as long as they're not Asian (South Asian is Asian). So I guess if you can show people you mingle with the exotic sort, more points?

And to finish off, I do suppose my judgements and opinions may be misguided by lack of sleep and stress, but they're my opinions, and you're just listening to me talk (reading what I say) and you didn't have to listen (read) you could've just walked away (closed the page). But yeah, its funny as.

Lol I realise this may contradict my attempt to socialise with Caucasians at the start of the semester, but on the contrary, I never said befriending non-Asians was tacky, I said trying to show it off was. What's there to show off anyway I'm not so sure. I actually know, I just wanna make it sound totally obsecure and sad.

If I had a larger/any following this is likely to result in a huge backlash.

P-p-p-portfolio?

2011-06-06T21:09:00.003+10:00

I think I may start a portfolio. Eh, just feeling a bit full of myself today.

30% of Generation Y is narcissistic, at least that's what one of my lecturers says. He always laughs at us and says "haha 30% of your generation are narcissists. I'm lucky I was born a few years earlier." I think he tells us cos it relates to what people buy and producing product that would appeal to the narcissists of today's younger generation? I shall not speculate on the relevance, maybe he just thinks its funny to taunt us.

Hmmm... Couldn't balance my balance sheet today during the exam. Kinda cross with myself cos I figured out 2 mistakes I made (no wonder it was 20k short on one side!!) but either way it still ain't balanced, which means there's at least one other mistake. Oh sigh. Oh well.

Um... Yeah k bye.

What Has Become Of The World?

2011-05-29T04:17:00.002+10:00

Everyone needs to give this shit a read.

A Whiter Australia?

And you have to read the comments too. Whichever way you perceive it, you will still be disgusted. Disgusted that the author was offended or disgusted that some people think the author had no right to be offended.

If you don't read it, in a nutshell, the blog post is about the Asian author waiting on a table at a restaurant. Upon serving dishes to a lady and two boys, one of the boys loudly said “KONICHIWA!!!”. The lady then said to the kid “Charlie, that’s rude!” good on her. The author still made a point to the lady to sort the kids out as racism starts from home.

Numerous comments are posted along with the blog post, about half of which take the stance that the child (said to be under 10) has done no wrong and was merely trying to be friendly, and the remaining half appalled that the child was even cheeky enough to dare mock a grown adult.

Now you will
a) think the author had no right to be cross and you pity the poor child for having done nothing wrong yet being reprimanded
b) be decently annoyed that the incident occurred in the first place

And upon reading the comments you will
a) get even more angry that anyone could possibly think the child has done any wrong
b) be absolutely disgusted that people think the child has done no wrong

I take the same firm view as the author. That it is intolerable to categorise people and hence greet them according to how you categorise them. Now I am paraphrasing from some of the comments that relate to the blog post. The issue is not that Charlie said “KONICHIWA!!!” to a non-Japanese but otherwise Asian appearing person. The issue is that he decided to greet this person of Asian appearance, a different way than he would have greeted someone else of say, Caucasian or Indian appearance.

It would be considered racial verbal abuse or racial taunting to walk up to an Irishman and speak to him in an Irish accent on purpose just for the bloody fact that he's Irish. The same way it would be to mock an Indian accent or a British accent when encountering an Indian or a Brit. I'm not particularly sure any Canadian appreciates constantly being taunted for having a Canadian accent either. So while a lot of people are upset that Victoria is being labelled racist against people who are obviously not of Caucasian descent, that isn't true, because even people who ARE of Caucasian descent, are the butts of jokes too. Have you seen the rage in someone of Southern European descent when they are called a "wog"? How someone looks or sounds should NOT be the bar in which anyone sets their treatment towards them.

Would the people who think the child did no wrong, say the same if the child had greeted a handicapped person with slow exaggeratedly emphasised words? I'd like to think not.

Just because one appears a certain way does not mean they afford different treatment. That my friend is discrimination. And thank fudge we have laws against discrimination in Victoria albeit not very well regulated (I should know I studied discrimination laws).

Oh don't get me started now on the different types of discrimination.

Someone I know got egged. A Thai girl and her mother had eggs THROWN at them by none other than a bunch of Caucasian children. The obvious fact here is that these children don't know any better and think they are superior to their victims. Such behaviour is unacceptable for ANYONE to commit, let alone from the so called "superior" breed these children think they are. How can people who think they are better than others, stoop so low? I would be as disgusted if it were Asian children who threw eggs at other Asian children. How anyone can think to even do such a thing horrifies me! (I am as appalled by the behaviour of these youngsters as I am with the man going around splashing acid on women's faces in Malaysia. What on earth possesses these people to think they can go around throwing things at other people???)

Charlie from earlier, could very well grow up to commit this egging crime.

And yes it IS a crime. A criminal offence called battery. Application of force was direct, injuries not required (that would be worse even), had intention for the eggs they were hurling to hit their victims, they had the foresight of the possibility that at least one of the eggs they threw would make contact, anddddd being negligent in throwing the eggs in bullshit. And if you add in the racial factor foooh heaps more there.

One day I will use the letter of the law against people who give me trouble. Now if only I had a device of software that identifies faces straight off a camera. Wouldn't it be lovely to have the name and address of your batterer or assaulter?

Now if you've got your undergarments in a knot filled with rage after reading what I have to say, take a deep breath, count to 10 and bear in mind I have been the target of numerous incidents, albeit non life threatening, traumatising. So I DO know what I'm talking about and I come from a standpoint as neutral to all races, nationalities and ethnicities as is politically correct. And lets face it, politically correct is about as neutral to all races, nationalities and ethnicities as anyone can get.

How's It Hanging Lol

2011-05-25T19:45:00.003+10:00

Yes yes I know I've been gone a while but I'm checking in now and I hope you are too!

A recap of this semester if you like.

Started first year at uni (AGAIN "-_-).
Made new friends.
Went to Daylesford with Bob.
Numerous racial abuse encounters, one even of a physical nature.
Gabryel visits. Had a lovely time.
Failed clubbing attempt.
Celebrated 21st birthday. Got kickass presents and cakes and obviously friends (well I didn't get the friends I already had them).

That's pretty much it.

On a completely unrelated note, geez some people can be so inconsiderate. I encountered two young not-so-ladies who were having a very long continuous conversation during a lecture. And when the guy in front of them asked them to be quiet, they both started laughing at him and one of them even clapped her hands, as though she was impressed he had dared to stand up to her. And then she continued to talk, louder. If there ever was a bitch I met, this girl would be the one. Obviously wasn't brought up very well. I take that back, I shouldn't say that, might not be her upbringing that was flawed, might just be her who's not very socially apt.

A little childish now no? And to think this sort of people are amongst us at a higher education level when it seems the rest of their education is pretty much non-existent.

So the kind of bullying I thought used to only be on TV shows or movies, actually is prevalent here, maybe elsewhere too, maybe even in Malaysia but most definitely not where I grew up so its a huge fucking realisation that the morals and manners of youth anywhere is on huge decline.

Its A Spaz Moment

2011-04-05T23:16:00.003+10:00

Hello Kitteh!!!

I'm having a spaz moment just looking at his picture.

Goddamnit!

How Did I End Up With This?

2011-04-04T02:51:00.002+10:00

Can you feel this magic in the air, it must've been the way you kissed me...

Ok. So. HOW THE FUCK DID I END UP WITH THE ONE GUY WHO IS TOTALLY ADVERSE TO PDA.

HOW HOW HOW is it possible that the grossly affectionate I'd-suck-your-face-anywhere-regardless-who's-watching Audrey, ended up with the man who is adverse to behaving affectionately in public.

All of the people I've ever dated have never had a problem with it. Numerous of them publicly declare their love for their other half, couple pictures everywhere, lovey wall posts on Facebook for us all to see. And how how how did I end up picking the one who likes to pretend I don't exist?

One of them is engaged to be married, good for him. To think if I'd dated him I'd he engaged right now is scary. Ok I shouldn't go on cos then you'd know how many people I've dated. Shhhhhh.

But yeah, its just insanulous to think that of all the options, I ended up with the one which won't let me suck his face in public. I don't particularly like to do that in public but really I mean if I wanted to suck face right then and there who caressssssss??

Right, so I think I probably have to get rid of this blog post cos its quite vulgar and grossly indecent.

Stuff So Far At Uni

2011-03-17T14:26:00.003+11:00

Ok I haz a shit load of uni work. And somehow after being absolutely inactive online for ages, I decide that I want to blog and update my Fb status a million times. I think its because I've actually switched my brain on and started thinking about things instead of the very inactive state of mind I've been in the last 8 months...

So three weeks of uni have gone by and I'm not sure what to make of it. I find that most of the Asian students in lecture halls are all in clusters. Of course you know about the Asian Clusters (thats what I call it). We tend to gather in groups based on where we're from and then from that large group we disperse to lectures in pairs of trios.

Sadly, I'm not in any Asian Clusters at RMIT so far... To be honest they intimidate me. Its like there's this gang of people who've all made friends with each other and I'm like such an outsider (this is so deja vu I feel like I've typed this out here before). So what I've put my mind to doing this semester is talk to Caucasians. Though I tend to target talking to people who are by themselves... Its a hit and miss kinda thing though, a lot of the people I've tried to talk to or sat with respond enough to be polite but they don't actually want to see you again or sit with you again.

I don't know what compelled me to do what I did but there was one lecture where everyone was waiting in the foyer for the earlier lecture to finish and I just walked across the foyer to the courtyard outside, up to a guy just standing there and started talking to him. Granted it was easy to start a conversation cos he was using a crutch so there's a bloody easy conversation starter. But yeah, afterwards I couldn't stop asking myself why I just looked at him and decided to go talk to him. Amazingly enough he's in first year but only turning 18! I am so old at that uni...

Oh yes btw I've jumped from Monash over to RMIT =) Many many people are surprised and amazed to find out I made that transition in silent mode.

Cheap OPI and China Glaze Anyone?

2011-03-14T22:37:00.004+11:00

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!!!

Ok finally I went to that nail polish warehouse!

I got 4 bottles of OPI nail colours, 3 China Glazes and a Orly Spritz Dry for only AUD77!!!

The OPI's were AUD11 each, the China Glazes were AUD6 each

and the Spritz Dry was AUD15. I've never bought China Glaze before so I don't know how much it would usually cost but in Malaysia, a 15ml bottle of OPI lacquer goes for RM59 so its slightly more than half to get it at this warehouse and that severly rocked!

If you want the address leave a comment. Apparently there are a few of these warehouses in Victoria...

I got (left to right) Cords, Prize Winning Mare, Recycle, Over the Taupe, Italian Love Affair, Charged Up Cherry and Lincoln Park After Dark.

I know you can't really see the colours properly but erm, lazy lah and lighting is nasty in this room!

And then I got an uber cool thermos mug from Bob!

And so I made good on my promise to update when I made it to that nail polish warehouse place =)

Sadly however, my nails were gorgeously perfect up till a week ago when they decided to chip =(

I also broke my own heart today. I found out that Michael Buble had been to Malaysia which prompted me to check if he'd been to Melbourne and then I wanted to kick myself in the nuts (I imagine that the physical pain of being kicked in the nuts if I had them, would make the pain of having been NOOB enough to not know that Michael Buble was in Melb, be a lot more trivial).

Last but not least, I am REALLY embarassed about the layout of the blogposts. Its probably because I'm not using my usual computer that Blogger refuses to let me have my way with font. I can't be bothered with the Html so I'm gonna leave it all ugly for now and when I get the chance I'll rectify it.

Little Bit Lost

2011-03-13T02:06:00.006+11:00

So I'm never blogging on my Blackberry again. Its plain to see why if you read the previous post at all. Out of all originalness I shan't edit it and shall just leave it as the ugly shit it is to remind me not to blog from my Bb.

Um so yeah, went for dim sum/dim sims/yum cha today. I am picking up too many Aussie words/local slang for my liking, I don't know which words to use when I talk to different people. I'm the retarded kind of person who talks to everyone differently, different accents different words different sentence structures. I FUCKING hate it! I feel like a douche but I really can't help it. Irritating.

Anyway, dim sum with Joanne and Joseph from my previous law studies and Kah Shin, Estee and Jun-Yeu. Feel a bit bad cos we got there first and made the mistake of ordering one dish cos then we felt obliged to eat it before it got cold and by the time the rest arrived we'd had a bit to eat already.

Erm, in my 4 years in Melb I ain't never felt the need to go to Moomba till today, I was slyly tricked into going. Oh well. I won't bore you with the details of that cos really we didn't do anything other than walk around and talk.

What else... Oh yeah, I'm really really upset that Thursday is St. Patrick's Day and I don't get to kiss any Irishmen =( like you know how they say kiss me I'm Irish? Fml... I hope my Irish tutor wears a kilt. When he's talking during tutorials, I have the biggest most psycho grin on my face, because I'm smiling to myself at his accent. Like every word that comes out of his mouth is ADORABLE.

Oodles of toodles, I swear I still haven't gone to that nail polish place yet!

I don't know why it won't let me enlarge my font =(

Bloggin On My BlackBerry Bitches!

2011-03-07T19:50:00.002+11:00

lo and behold! - i haz a blackberry! as you can see, it won't let me capitalise my alphabets hence the horrid grammar lacking small letters... weird... anyway, talk about micro blogging.

so there's a guy on the train who walks my way after we get off the train, i wonder if i should talk to him. he's the only non-uncleish guy who goes that way. buttttt he carries a big backpackers backpack and looks like a serial killer cos he's always mr grumpy face frowns. maybe his big backpack is where he keeps his serial killing tools?

also, sometimes i find free newspaper on the train, and there's a section at the back that lets people send notes to each other albeit under pseudonyms (stfu i don't know how to spell it properly and i'm in the middle of dinner). its cute to read what all the single people say and their flirts. kinda makes you wanna pretend you're single and flirt along. thats the draw isn't it, these single people are desperately looking for someone who's caught their eye, and taken people think the chase is fun. why is it human nature for the chase to be fun? also, i'm ending here but my bb won't let me enter and leave spaces . won't let me put a sad face either.

Sooooo Longggg

2011-02-19T04:11:00.002+11:00

OH MY GOD I haven't blogged in a while, a long while... I honestly really have nothing going on right now much less anything I'd like to publicly discuss... Actually, I don't know who even reads this blog anymore "-_- probably due to my negligence in not updating, people lose interest. I remember religiously following one blog until the blogger stopped updating for like two months, I don't think I've checked in since...

Anyway, while I'm here...

Damnit I forgot what I wanted to say. Something about it being easy to not want anything more or envy other people when you have something right in front of you that you know is worth more than anything in the world/is worth enough to make everything else unimportant (I felt like saying disimportant but I know that's not right).

So I read on someone's blog (one of my uni mates and I don't know if I should comment on her blog cos then she'll know I read it and I can't decide if its weird or not) that there's a warehouse in Footscray that sells branded nail polish really cheap. So like hoorah! I promise to update when and if I find it. If its really as cheap as the nail blogs say then I haz so gotta go pick some colours up! And yes I meant to say haz.

Oodles of toodles.

2011-01-25T21:15:00.002+11:00

Oh hai!!!

I was waiting to get Photoshop before I put up any pictures. Actually I haven't much to put up.

Eye problems I know...

Errrr... Yeah I can't think of anything else. I know I said updates soon but actually, got no updates lor, I mean by now they seem quite trivial to me already...

Anyway, hope you are well.

Legend

2010-12-23T01:36:00.003+11:00

O damn this is funny.

I are bored in Malaysia. Nothing to do.

Updates soon.

No Ah?

2010-11-14T19:32:00.003+11:00

Think Geek has a lot of really stupid pointless stuff that I like =) Some are functional, like solar powered chargers for small electronic devices, and others are totally pointless like these adorable samurai sword chopsticks.

If it weren't for the fact that the name Ariel sounds like aerial meaning antenna or something relating to the air and; the name Noah sounds like "no ah?", I think I'd like those names. Oh but then there's the mermaid named Ariel, and I dontch really like that mermaid.

i > u

2010-11-10T20:32:00.002+11:00

i > u

Its true.

I wanna play The Sims lahhhh. Like the original one, the simple easy noobcake one. I hate when they add stuff to it, my brain can't function to handle so many things at once.

Kissing is like real estate. The most important thing is location, location, location.

If you have noticed the lack of activity in my life, it is because I indeed do not do much with it. At present I'm so bored out of my mind I'm planning a party that's to take place in January.

An Apple Pie A Day Keeps Me Busy

2010-11-04T00:41:00.003+11:00

I made apple pies =)

Apparently you're not a real woman unless you can make a pie. At least family raising material if you cannot make an apple pie, but suck that I say I can make a lot of other things pie making women can't! But anyway now I've added pies to my list of achievements

I cheated lah actually. I bought the pastry. Lovely pre-made squares of gorgeous dough. To be honest, making the pastry is my weakness, so now that I have found a way to get past the pastry making failure, voila! Presto magico, pie.

The most fun part was weaving the top pastry. Oh what fun. I discovered however, that it is impossible for me to do the base nicely cos my nails are long and there's no pressing he pastry into the bottom corners without poking holes in them.

This is the before I popped it in the oven. I know its silly to show you the before but was so much prettier before.

And then splat.

Next time I gotta weave it a little tighter so it doesn't bloat up in some parts. And I forgot to oil one of the pie pans so one pie has to be eaten right out of the pan. Oh well. Its sexy like that.

Strangely enough, even though I made 2 apple pies, instead of eating them, I went and made Maggi mee.

Haha

2010-10-31T03:48:00.002+11:00

Winnie the Pooh was based on psychological problems: Pooh had an eating disorder. Piglet, a generalised anxiety disorder. Eeyore had major depression and Tigger had ADHD.

A: If I could change the alphabet, I'd put 'U' and 'I' together.
B: There's no need for that. 'N' and 'O' are already next to each other.

Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?

Where in the nursery rhyme does it say that Humpty Dumpty is an egg?

Who's cruel idea was it to put the 'S' in lisp?

Card Stash

2010-10-25T07:46:00.004+11:00

Like OMG can? Went through some stuff and came across my stash of birthday cards and other cards. Christ Irwan made the coolest most adorable cards!

O damn.

Mohd's first creation.

And my drawer friend, everytime I see this envelope I just fkin crack up.

Someone who draws well is a drawer isn't it? Lol!

Got so many more and they all totally put a smile on my face.

Most of the cards and letters were posted to me in Melbourne or given to me just before I left Malaysia. Most of them are from my first year here, after that, mega dwindle in received cards and letters. Even birthday cards don't come in the mail anymore =( Oh well.

Tiny Hoodies

2010-10-21T21:16:00.004+11:00

I don't understand why it seems that I look best at night just as I'm about to go to bed =( Be it my hair, complexion or eyebags, always at night when no one's around. Big sigh.

Lol look what I got XD

The most adorable ipod jacket in the world! A fkin hoodie hehehehehehehe!!!

Someone should really make a zipper hoodie one, or maybe a leather jacket one. So adorable!

Can fit my iPod or phone. A bit tight but I'm pretty sure it'll loosen up after a couple of "wears".

I found it online but didn't let myself succumb to online shopping temptation till I walked into Borders and saw it on the shelf. DIE LAH. Right in front of me how to not buy?

I watched Bride Wars thrice within the last 2 nights and (because Kate Hudson's beau proposed with a Tiffany & Co. ring) decided I want myself some Tiffany & Co. merchandise. I devised a devious plan, to walk Bob past Tiffany & Co. and mention something about wanting something from there. But I never got the chance cos we were always on the other side of the mall and quite frankly I also lazy to walk lah, so I turned to Bob and said "I want something from Tiffany & Co. so I had planned to walk you past the shop and drop a hint but since I've already told you my plan it defeats the purpose altogether." His response? "That was so subtle."

When people tell you men are dense creatures who can't take hints, believe them. Its much easier to say it to their face. I can't say it absolutely works cos I ain't got any little Tiffany blue boxes yet but heck, you're only gonna get a whole bowl of disappointment with a side serve of frustration if you hint. Ask and you might actually get what you wanted! Ambassador for don't ask don't get.

Speaking of jewelery, I made myself the most adorable ring, au natural made of weeds and grass:

In case you miss my face.

Ruined Chocolates

2010-10-19T16:51:00.003+11:00

I'm pretty annoyed with myself. Twice already I've left chocolates in the car and had them melt. I wouldn't feel so bad if they were like blocks of chocolate cos you could sorta let those solidify back into something of a block, but there were handmade chocs and individual pebble-ish chocolates =(

Oh I'm so cross with myself.

Koko Black chocolates still rock lah. Better than Cacao in my opinion.

Too Damn Fast

2010-10-18T01:09:00.003+11:00

Pokemonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!

I is audamon.

Uhhhhh... Chomp chomp... Nom nom. Wheeeeeeeeeeeeee!

I miss Kit and Zwee. Somehow them moving even farther away, from Malaysia to UK, is dreadfully upsetting. Even though there isn't much difference them being in Malaysia or the UK and me being stuck here in the land down under.

Joanne is sort of the only one left in Malaysia, save Irwan and Shin Yin and a few girls from secondary school. Everyone else is abroad now. I don't see much point in going back to be honest. But surely for Joanne I will have to muster the will somehow. I can't wait to see the boys though when they get back from UK. And soon enough off Joe will go too.

Having Bob here makes being here so much more bearable - to the extent I could say I'd rather not leave.

Chinese New Year, what a limbo, I want to be in Malaysia for that but is there any point celebrating a festival when all your friends and family aren't there with you?

I need a tractor and a bus, a trailer and a jeep, a handyman and a ute.

The end of October is approaching. Soon it'll be November and then December and in the blink of an eye, holy motherload its 2011. Christ man... And it doesn't even seem like that long ago that I was fussing over what to call 2010. I mean in 09 we called it O-nine. You can't call 2010 O-ten cos that's silly. Doesn't even seem like that long ago that I was talking to Ben every night on Skype. Too damn fast I say, too damn fast.

No Running For Me =(

2010-10-09T15:04:00.002+11:00

Lol my Mum so funny. The "about me" section on my Skype profile used to say "I heart Kubhan" and my Mum told my sister to tell me to change it LOLLLLLL.

The weather, oh Jesus its so fickle...

The Melbourne Marathon is on tomorrow and I was supposed to take part in the 5.7km run (which apparently you're not allowed to walk in you have to run, if you want to walk you have to join their 4km walk). Anyway, I don't get to run anymore cos I pulled a hamstring or something like that. I was limping for a week lol. Estee found it very amusing to walk up a flight of stairs and then just mock me by waiting impatiently for me at the top.

I'm nervoussssss!!! Photoshoot on Friday gg. I'm afraid of all the big photographer men. I damn kekok lah dunno how to pose later I become so frustrating to photograph they all beh tahan me.

A Day At Daylesford

2010-10-01T14:50:00.005+10:00

Okay... So I pulled a hamstring while playing pool a couple of nights ago. Highly bogus. Meh, of all the things to be doing when you pull a muscle, pool? Pfft... And it hurtsssssssssssssss!

Went to Daylesford, Victoria. Nothing much there but its nice and quiet but still vibrant for a tiny little town. Got some neat as second hand stores. Got myself a little coke bottle from this ginormous shed of second hand stalls (if you didn't know, I collect Coke memorabilia).

I didn't actually buy these at Daylesford, Bob got them for me the last time he was there, I just thought I'd show you.

Also got some nice Sandy Lion stickers from a bookstore. Geez man who sells Sandy Lion stickers these days anymore other than on ebay? And yes, unlike the rest of you, I haven't gotten over collecting stickers and putting them in my sticker book. Just that these days I buy instead of trade stickers cos well, who the eff am I gonna trade stickers with, even my little sister stopped collecting stickers like years ago.

Went to some chocolate factory too called Chocolate Mill which is like just a lil farther up from Daylesford. Bob bought some chocolates for me to gobble up with coffee, and the little box below for Rachel and Ken. Yes my beloved sister, they are hand made.

Didn't get to go for any massages, facials, spas or even a manicure or pedicure cos they were all booked out and well lo and behold we didn't pre-book any treatments.

To get a spray tan or not to get a spray tan, that is the question. Can't decide man...

There aren't any pictures of me at Daylesford cos well, there actually aren't any. Nobody whipped their camera out. But I drove back hehe.

And on a completely different and random note, what on earth am I supposed to do with these?

Adorable Trinkets

2010-09-28T14:56:00.006+10:00

I delivered the donuts I made to someone who ate one of the little ball shaped ones and threw the rest in the bin. Tqvrymch.

After talking to Joanne Chong last night, I realise I need more real life friends. People I can physically catch up with over meals or some random activity. Right now all my entire social life revolves around electronic media. Be it Facebook, email, Skype or texting. Heck, even blogging. But I have only a handful of friends I can actually go out with and have a good time with.

A handful of close friends within a visiting vicinity is perfectly fine, until they all decide they're busy on the same night! Omg then you're in trouble.

I was on the phone with Gab almost two hours I think the other day and it made me miss being able to talk to someone who's actually there and whom you have a history with. At least they know what you're going on about when other people won't lol.

I showed Gab this website and we spent ages talking about how cute the stuff is. And no lah Gab's not gay he just very layan me. So wonderful to have friends who layan me lol cos I'm so childish and annoying (yes I know it).

If you receive adorable trinkets from me, you can guess where I got them lah. But her custom made stuff, not too awesome. Custom made varying from what she normally makes is still safe cos she doesn't have to create a new design entirely, but custom making things that are completely not in her catalog, a bit dangerous. But she's brilliant anyway!

Look at the tiniest doughnut! Its so tiny!

They're a little bit fragile, the end of the bacon fell off lol. And the steak, doesn't really look like the best steak out there. These two I had custom made out of the ordinary she usually makes.

Anddddd tadaaaa! 3 green tea frappes for me, Kit and Zwee. But like I said they're fragile, 2 of the straws fell off during shipping. They're so small so kyute!!!

And the most adorablest little cupcake in the world.

Donuts!

2010-09-27T22:28:00.003+10:00

I made donuts. Jesus they're hard to make!!!

Made an absolute mess of my kitchen and used the most pathetic pot to deep fry em in.

Cookies vs donuts. Donuts are so much harder to make! Especially if your dough is being sticky and bitchy like mine was! And to deep fry it omg you have to watch each one like a hawk.

Tip: If the donuts colour looks pretty while its still being fried, its gonna be all dark brown when it gets out. So take em out just before they look pretty.

End product:

As you can see I couldn't decide on a shape lol. But the centers of the donuts went to making the little balls on the right and those were easy to cook. The bigger it is the more dangerous, cos the outside might be looking cooked and the inside might still not be.

Making donuts alone, you can imagine how fun that must be.

Ava The Avocado

2010-09-24T02:20:00.002+10:00

I don't know about you, but I have the best damn boyfriend in the world!

Aside from that, I'm really really hungry and am going to make myself a Milo.

I've been well fed over the past few weeks with meals prepared and waiting for me from the moment I wake up in the morning. Now that I'm left to fend for myself all over again, I've resumed eating nonsense for breakfast lunch and dinner.

Avocados are amazing. Like seriously I'd just have an avocado as a snack. Fooyoh powerful.

Vin has taken another lady friend. I know its not interesting to you but its like milestone worthy in my calender.

Zwee's already in UK and Kit's leaving soon boo hoo. I'm not even really gonna miss them that much cos I'm already apart from them right now, but I somehow still feel pretty darn sad that they're leaving. But of course at the same time excited as hell for them. Rurve you boys.

Should've Just Married Me Lah

2010-09-22T01:02:00.002+10:00

Gah, I've been writing so many short poems lately. Not pleased with myself for not being able to finish them. I haven't written anything in a while and suddenly feel the urge to write but can't seem to find enough inspiration to finish it. No focal point, harder to write.

Fkin hell Kenny Chesney rocks.

Did you know he was married to Renee Zellweger for about seven and a half months? Mannnnn I don't like her. It was his first marriage, and it had to end in divorce? Geez, he shoulda just married me wtf...

What's In A Name Anyway...

2010-09-17T20:52:00.003+10:00

Jamie Oliver's childrens' names:

Poppy Honey
Daisy Boo
Petal Blossom Rainbow
Buddy Bear Maurice

Jamie and his wife Jools just had their first son on Wednesday so its in the news and when I read it I was like ALAMAK... Buddy Bear Maurice "-_-

His girls can get away with it cos girls are adorable and when they're older or much older, Poppy, Daisy and Petal Blossom (at least I think they would call her that instead of rainbow), will still be pretty sweet ladies names. But omgwtfbq Buddy Bear Maurice? Thankfully they were cautious enough to give him the option of using Maurice when he's older but did they really have to have the Buddy or the Bear. I mean either would have been about enough. Buddy Maurice or Bear Maurice but whyyyyyyyyyyyy both...

I need to keep a tab on this child's progress in the years to come. In ten years time when he's 10, I'll be 30, and I'll be googling his name for news about him.

Heart Mike Tompkins

2010-09-14T16:53:00.004+10:00

I is in love, big time. Some people are awed by his talent, I am awed by his good looks.

The first video of his I watched was Teenage Deam & Just The Way You Are and I actually thought nothing of him untilllllllll... The last part where he took his headphones off. I melted into a puddle.

Delicious he is.

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

I'm so fickle, everyday in love with a different celebrity.

I wanted to dye my hair dark brown with this new foam hair dye. You don't have to part the hair at the roots and plaster it with dye, just massage the foam into your hair like how you'd shampoo your hair, leave it for like 20 minutes and when you was it off, viola, dyed hair. So easy lah don't need to mafarn mafarn go touch up just dye your whole damn head all over.

But but but. I swore swore swore already that I would not dye my hair cos you'll never get back to your natural colour unless you let it grow out and look like a douche for 2 years while the hair grows out. So I cannot, I cannot allow myself to do it. If you ever see me with dyed hair, then I obviously succumbed to the supercool interesting new hair dyeing technique.

Lazy to go into details. The Singaporean website is here.

How Much Does This Cost?

2010-09-04T20:20:00.006+10:00

"I was at the store with my dad. Coming out of an aisle was a man with his girlfriend over his shoulder. She was laughing while the man went up to a store employee and asked the price of the merchandise he was holding. Their love GMH."

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh so cute!!!

Hot Damn

2010-09-04T15:23:00.003+10:00

Haaaaaaaaaahahaha my life is so full of nonsense.

I found it highly amusing that someone thought I looked about 14. So pleased to know that I do indeed look young.

Within the same day, another thought I was really pretty and wanted me to date either of his uni going sons.

And yes, I'm so good looking I've been hired for a photo shoot.

Muahahahahahaha, damn sleepy, good night.

Behold, A Problematic Youthful Society

2010-09-04T00:27:00.002+10:00

So right there's this guy on fb who asked me to change my profile picture. It was like a huge lol moment for me cos the first thing that came to mind was that he's the one who's never had a girlfriend let alone have a girl even interested in him and he's the one with a close up photo of his face as a profile picture. No prizes for guessing why I found it amusing.

I've been reading KidsGiveMeHope and some of the tales are adorable and heartwarming.

I taught my Mum how to Facebook stalk people lol. I also had to sort her privacy settings out for her haha. Got me thinking though, little kids can't really fix up their own privacy settings too well can they? Certainly some can but others won't quite know how. Quite gg lah for small kids who use Fb and aren't really well protected or monitored.

And that in turn got me thinking, advancement in technology is supposed to be a good thing, but of course along with good things come bad things. But the negative influences of the internet lets say, is pretty darn nasty. I mean those were the days there was bullying. Now there's bullying + cyber bullying. Double dosage much?

I wonder why kids think its ok to say things to people, that they wouldn't usually say to the person face to face. How is the cyber world any different from the real world? Why are they that much more bold and disrespectful when they're online. Hiding behind online anonymity is one thing, but its something else when you're not being anonymous and that everyone knows who you are, there's nothing to hide behind.

Shouldn't children know better than to think the internet is some sort of sheild? They seem to think its not reality and that normal everyday morals and values their parents should by right have thought them, don't apply online.

Reminds me of Vin's old Friendster profile. A lot of girls he was hardly acquainted to let alone actually even friends with, would write really flirty "testimonials" on his profile and that left me pretty much boiling (at that point in time his profile was filled with confessions of love to me so it was pretty plain to see that he was indeed a taken man). These girls, knowing he was taken, would boldly and openly tell him how hot and sexy he was and that they missed him, and sign off with obscenities like "kisses" and "muaxxxx", you get the drift. Would these girls behave the same way with him face to face? I'd like to think not, for if the answer is yes, we have a serious moral problem amongst youngsters.

A Female Son Of A Bitch Is A?

2010-09-01T05:14:00.002+10:00

Sons of bitches and the female versions of those. Why is there no female version of that phrase? I think its cos the phrase actually stems from the vulgarity "bitch". And then they sat there and wondered what they'd call a guy who was being a bitch, and realised they can't call him a bitch so they'll call him a son of a bitch. That's just what I think.

Sigh, its hard to get along with people you used to know or used to be close to, ie exes, when instead of moving on, growing up and learning from their mistakes, all they do is dwell on the past and everything you did wrong.

If its been a while and it wasn't an abusive relationship, I like to think two people can get along. Vin and I certainly do, I'm dying to show you how fat he's gotten but I don't have pictures.

What's even more pathetic than 2 exes not being able to get along because of past conflicts, is when their friends seem to be the ones who can't move on. It reflects as though one parties friends are even more badly affected by the ex than his/her friend who indeed was in the relationship. Peculiar, but I guess it can happen.

Lol I've been saying indeed a lot lately.

2 items came in the mail for me today and I was and am ecstatic.

Uh, today's Malaysia's Independence Day (well more like yesterday) and today's Kah Shin's birthday. Happy Birthday Kah Shin. Love you. I've got more brilliantly awesome wine for our next dinner party!

Personals Ads At School

2010-08-31T03:51:00.002+10:00

There's this thing on the Monash University portal called the Monash Marketplace where one can place and respond to classified ads, like selling stuff or looking for stuff and sometimes services like babysitting etc.

Of late, there's been an influx of male students placing ads looking for either international female students or just female students in general to "befriend". Holy shit its weird.

I find it utterly hilarious, especially some of the responses. I don't mean to be mean, but the responses that really crack me up are the ones in broken English complete with their mobile numbers.

If I were a guy I'd tip my hat to these other guys, what an ingenious way to score absolutely oblivious chicks. But judging by the most likely predatory nature of these "personals" ads, coupled with the fact that I'm a girl and obviously need to support my own kind, I'm inclined to think these guys are douches.

Buckle Your Watermelons Up

2010-08-24T18:03:00.004+10:00

Today I experienced something like what this adorable old man did in the ad.

Only I put the watermelon in the boot and got a fright of my life the first time it bumped into the boot wall, I thought someone punched/hit my car. But when I realised what it was it was too late to move the melon cos I was in the middle of traffic. But the watermelon survived, unharmed.

One whole watermelon makes more juice than one little girl can drink. WAY more juice.

Animal Kingdom 2008

2010-08-22T01:26:00.003+10:00

Never give Audrey stickers.

She will never have enough of them.

I got a stack of tiny Croation chocolate bars for kids from Bob. Each chocolate bar comes with a sticker of an animal or some kind of living creature. Needless to say, I ate all the chocolates up and now have a bunch of stickers.

The stickers aren't the pretty pink furry flowery stickers I adore, they're banal pictures of animals and other living creatures. But what makes me a sucker for them is that they're all numbered. The entire series goes from 1-250 and there's even a sticker album with assigned boxes for each sticker along with a printed description of the creature.

Now I can easily get hold of more chocolates to complete the collection but now I'm going crazy scouring the internet for the album. Even to the extent of emailing other collectors but nobody can help me!

Then I happened to stumble upon a site that sells Sandylion stickers (Sandylion stickers are in my opinion the most collectable stickers out there lah). Of course I spent the next few hours browsing the stickers for sale and persuading myself not to buy them.

What Doting Parents

2010-08-10T20:41:00.003+10:00

I love involved parents. They're adorable. But sometimes they need to know where to draw the line and thats so subjective.

The picture below is from my kindergarden's webpage. When I went on their field trips as a kindy goer, parents would send their maids along on the field trip for whatever reason be it lend a hand or keep an extra eye on their own child. But parents themselves hardly ever accompanied their kids on these field trips.

Now I see so many parents tagging along. I don't know what to make of it, sure the world is getting more dangerous etc. I can't imagine what I'd do if I were in a parents' shoes though. Tag along or not.

Anyhoo... Look at that, so cute, you'd expect mothers to go along but there's a dad! Its so funny that a father would go. In my time I swear there were none.

7cm Taller

2010-08-04T00:23:00.003+10:00

I really don't like Katie Holmes. How she looks, her voice and her kid. Ugh. Worst of all is her performance in First Daughter. Beh tahan. But Marc Blucas. HOT DAMN that shit be fiiiiiiine.

Ok stop talking about other men.

Oh yeah, I damn angry lorh. I just found out (from the movie First Daughter) that arms outstretched on both sides, middle finger to middle finger is equivalent to one's height. And what I'm angry about it that I should be about 7cm taller than I am at present if it weren't for my stupid spine all fused together. FML!!! I'd really like to have been that 7cm taller.

Pfft. Damn pei now.

And I stand by the fact that shampoo boys are much much more gentle than shampoo girls. The last time I cut my hair I made a note in my phone to blog about it but forgot. The shampoo girl totally man-handled me! And she started blowing my hair dry (again I maintain that she was pretty darn rough) but then let a guy take over and he was much more careful.

So right my room window has a gap in it and lets all the cold air in. Its mighty cold especially when its raining. I've resorted to taping the blinds to the window frame. Hooooho, does the trick, for now at least.

Its been like 4 hours since I found out about the height thing, and I'm still damn pissed. I don't know why I'm angry about it, I just am.

Chasing White Boys With Black Eggs In Hand

2010-08-02T15:03:00.004+10:00

Yesterday I chased a white boy around with a centuary egg. He said it was gross and scary that I was trying to make him eat a black egg and that it smelt like Footscray markets. It was funny.

Centuary egg = basically an egg that's been preserved. Wikipedia has a good explanation.

After being chased around and persuaded, he took the tiniest bite, chewed for like 4 seconds and spat it out into a tissue. LOOOOOOOOoooool. Now you know how Footscray tastes.

And I stole frozen durian from Ken. Not nice lah, I mean its better than the whole durians they sell in Safeway/Coles but its damn heaty la. Like, really can feel your throat feel funky after eating it. Fresh durian ftw lah.

Zomg Excessively Awesome Dessert

2010-07-30T02:18:00.004+10:00

Tonight Joanne was telling me about her recent conversation with Kubhan. He still owes me RM80 and refuses to pay me back. He has the balls to tell me he doesn't need to pay me back cos it was money I lent him during the relationship and since we've broken up its not relevant anymore. Balls. Ugh you know what I'll stop talking about him here cos really I have nothing good to say about him and I can go on for thousands of words giving you facts about how worthless a human being he is.

Ugh, but let it just be said that right now I'm bordering on pissed.

I went to Eureka Skydeck today. Did that stupid glass box thingy too, The Edge. Basically, you stand in a glass box (floor, ceiling, side walls all glass) and then the box moves 3 meters out of the building, basically cantilevered lah. Chibai scary lah.

Went for dinner in this Italian place, Tutto Bene in Southgate Plaze. Read online that they have awesome risotto so went there with Bob. I'm no risotto connoisseur la, white people food I cannot judge (but Bob said both our dishes rocked, take his word for it he's a fuss pot when it comes to good food), but HOLYF*** their desserts are good!

Imagine la, I'd eaten 3/4 of my risotto already and was too full to finish the rest, I was already bursting. See see I managed to finish my entire desert and like maybe a third of Bob's. The desserts were some chocolate fondant cake and the other was some vanilla mousse. I don't have pictures la, see if another day I can pinch em off Bob. But that shit was good.

Teacup Painting Success

2010-07-27T00:31:00.003+10:00

I made a pasta bake today. K I dunno if its supposed to be baked pasta, or pasta bake without the 'a' cos like I really dunno what its supposed to be but the bottle of sauce said pasta bake so I'll pretend that correct.

I can hear ten different people screaming that I put way too much cheese on it lol.

I'm damn hungry right now and I totally want to have cream puffs and Chipsmore biscuits! And I'm like just thinking, the only 24/7 Asian grocery I know is in the city and I'mma so not driving all the way there to buy Chipsmore. I can't remember if they'd have Chipsmore in petrol station marts. And as for cream puffs, DAMNNNNNNnn I wish I could just drive to One U and buy some.

While I was in Msia, I attempted oil painting. Kinda fail lah cos I'm so noob. I really thought it was gonna be easy, I mean it looks easy enough. But its difficult as. It is however, really really awesome mixing the colours. They just blend so easily to get different shades and all, plus this was my first time using oil paints. I've only ever used poster pain in the past and I don't like water colour.

And this is what it was ACTUALLY supposed to be:

A teacup.

Oh shuddup. When you do a better job then only come tell me mine's ugly.

I Hate Wishful Thinking

2010-07-23T01:57:00.002+10:00

I hate wishful thinking.

I tend to go on and have these wonderful thoughts in my head because I misinterpret reality.

And then reality comes knocking and reminds me that shit ain't gonna happen.

I do a lot less perfect-life fantasising now than I used, to but as realistic as I try to be, like I said, I manage to misinterpret reality.

I miss opportunities by misinterpreting reality, I get in too deep by misinterpreting reality, like hello, why doesn't my brain work. I'm cautious when I need not be, and I let go when I should be cautious.

My mind used to make perfect plans of things I wanted regardless how unrealistic. Now, I only allow it to make semi-perfect plans based on real things happening in real time, but it seems I make out the complete opposite of actual fact.

Or is it because people just aren't as honest as they can be and lead you to think one way while truly thinking another causing this false sense of reality.

Today was a fairytale, I wore a dress, you wore a dark grey t shirt.
You didn't tell me I was pretty even though I didn't look like a mess.

New Adjustments

2010-07-20T02:18:00.003+10:00

Whoah haven't I been naughty.

Sorryyyyy. I'm back in Melbourne now so uh, its likely that soon enough I will be bored enough to blog frequently. But honestly, I really hope not. I hope I'm too busy with everything else in the world (ie uni) to blog. I really really hope so. Cos I didn't do very well last sem and my parents are threatening to send me back to Malaysia.

Just when I've adjusted to life in Melbourne, just when I'm happy to be here and don't miss Malaysia, just when all my friends who are in Malaysia are leaving to further their studies abroad, just then my parents consider sending me back to Malaysia, something I've been begging them to do throughout 2008 and 2009. Geez.

So, if I blog infrequently, hope for my sake its because I'm too busy with uni.

How Come?

2010-07-13T14:15:00.001+10:00

How come sometimes people just can't see that you're willing to so much just to be with them?

I'm gonna try out coloured contact lenses. Can't wait to get them and see what a sakai I'd look like!

Gtg, mother yelling at me. Its so fun to be home and get the life nagged out of me.

I'm In Love With Edward Cullen

2010-07-11T02:14:00.002+10:00

I'm in love with Edward Cullen.

Don't get me wrong, Robert Pattinson is really ugly, me may have the awesome jaw thing going on but he ugly.

Not Edward Cullen, he's something else. He loves Bella so much. I dontch like Jake/Taylor Lautner. I don't think he's hot lor. Stomach abs abs all I dontch really like. Why do I keep getting side tracked, I'm supposed to be talking about Edward Cullen lah.

Edward Cullen:
1. Clingy (I give him +697 for this attribute)
2. Posessive (ok la too posessive for my liking -6)
3. Protective (I give +1 cos its kinda expected d)
4. Ugly (neutral zero, cos not his fault they chose Pattinson)
5. Believes in having sex only after marriage (where to find guys like that nowadays +317 or maybe I'm mixing with all the wrong people)
6. Knows EXACTLY what a girl wants cos he can read her mind (Fooyoh he gets +565 for this, but can also be negative if the girl wants to get jiggy with someone else lah)

Clingy is his best quality.

Woot woot!!! You very free go to One Utama see the guy who works in Crocs (not Irwan lah the ohter Malay guy, his name start with A wan kua). I know my taste got problem, but really, he's cute. Uh then right I told Gabryel I thought this guy was good looking and the first thing out of Gabryel's mouth - "he's 28." Jackpot mou? My relationship status is in jeopardy now I better stop talking.

Uh, yeah so my phone credit has been DRAINING lately all because my internet has been perpetually on without my knowledge and I've apparently been connected to the internet from my phone non stop for about 6 days straight. Fuck my life! That's a shit load of money there for nothing!!! One day I had like RM14 in my phone, and the next day, just 27 hours later, I had 12cents what the fark. International sms is 20cents, in that 27 hours I did NOT send 70 international smses. Really, it was the internet. Bollocks. Anyway now its fixed, but only after about 60 Ringgit had been wasted.

JESUS!

That Shit Sizzles

2010-07-03T04:48:00.002+10:00

I am in love with:

Aaron Johnson who plays Robbie in Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging.

That shit sizzles.

But even more than Aaron Johnson, I love Sean Bourke!!!!

Did you expect me to like the one with more hair more than the one with less hair? You gotta be kidding me.

Sean Bourke Sean Bourke Sean Bourke Sean Bourke.

And of course I like Bob too.

but...

Sean Bourke Sean Bourke Sean Bourke Sean Bourke Sean Bourke Sean Bourke Sean Bourke Sean Bourke Sean Bourke Sean Bourke Sean Bourke.

This Ligament Be Torn Yo

2010-06-30T23:48:00.003+10:00

So I arrived in KL on Monday and spent the whole day with my family cos I was gonna ditch them from Tuesday till I flew back to Melbourne. Kononnya, Tuesday morning I tore a ligament in my neck. All I did was turn my head to my right and then I heard s funny sound, like a had bitten sand and next thing I knew I couldn't face the front, my head was tilted to my right and facing my right as well. And Kit tries to help me stretch it cos we didn't know what was wrong with me, I heard the sound again means the ligament tore even more!

Anyway I went to the hospital and looked like an idiot having to hold my head up in that position cos if I moved my head I'd get a sharp pain which was almost unbearable. And an xray confirmed that I tore a ligament in my neck wtf. And I wasn't even really doing anything!

So no holidays or partying for me. But I won't let it stop me from going out lah, I'm not one to let a little neck brace and looking like a retard restrict my freedom.

Anyhoo... I fixed the little one's hair. Should've taken a before and after, show you my magic hair styling powers!

Damn chubby right? Also damn shnubby.

So right my little sister's a real nerd ass genius. She got first in the form last year, highest in the form for History and Living Skills and got trophys for them and all that. So my aunt got her this Coach keychain for being so uber smart.

Instead of using it, she hangs it on her bedside lamp and puts this inside:

Ugh... Her favourite Super Junior member. Yuck. At least use it lah or put my pretty face inside or give it to me mahhhhh!

She's so in love with him until her handphone also wanna hang his name "-_-

More hair fashion!!! When Lady Gaga see's this she's gonna wanna copy it!

Where's Bob?

What We Do With Emkay

2010-06-26T14:02:00.006+10:00

Okayyyyy so Emkay is here on holiday. Met up with her and Shin after my last paper on Wednesday afternoon...

First stop: Tai Pan Restaurant in Doncaster for dim sum. The day I start calling it yum cha, is when I know I'm truly Aussiefied. Its like calling McD Maccas - its life changing.

Ugly exam mode get up and hairstyle. Ugh.

Emkay and Shin.

Part of what we ate. We totally pigged out like mad massive oink oink stuffed.

Then we went to Chadstone which is like meh... Then we met up with Jun for dinner lor... 4/13 or Family 13. If Estee was still in Melb quite onz la 5/13 of us. We ate at Oriental Spoon, Korean shiz la... It be tasty.

Uh then we went to Crown to uh... Waste money? I won like 4 bucks playing the pokies. Actually I had 5 bucks profit but then I went and wasted one of those dollars trying to win more money. Quite sad la, if not I untung 5 bucks just by sitting there and pressing a bunch of buttons. They don't let you use Malaysian drivers license anymore wor to go into the casino... Laminated cards not allowed. Ish, end up having to show my IC look so ugly bluek.

After winning 5 bucks, I proceeded to waste like 10 bucks playing stupid things in the arcade heeeehehehe.

Harley racing. It must be a new thing...

Biker #1.

Biker #2.

Sexy biker wannabe.

PLAYER!!!

Uh, biker with a man's head attached to the top of hers?

And then we played laser tag. I admit, it was really fun. I was bitching and whining about it at first cos I really didn't wanna play but it ended up being awesome. It was supposed to be us against four white adult men. Gg la, so we thought we'd trade 2 of us for 2 of them, but they didn't want, they only traded one, gave us their lousiest player and we gave them Jun which was pathetic.

Jun was absolute highest. I placed third (so proud), then Emkay and Shin.

And then we enjoyed a lovely walk back, in the bloody, freezing, cold.

Jun's uh, blue jacket. I swear, sometimes it looks like its such a dark blue you mihgt as well disregard that hint of blue and call it black!

I just think Jun looks damn funny here.

The next day we had dinner with Rui Zhen, Carmen and uh, oh god I can't remember what that guy's name is lah, but he's very nice and funny. I also forgot the name of the place. I was very very sleepy.

She's Boobless Too!

2010-06-25T05:06:00.005+10:00

How come Kate Hudson can be so flat and not wear a a bra and get away with being that flat? I mean look at that:

Kate Hudson's boobs versus I don't know who's boobs.

Now I can die in peace with no breast enhancements. No pressure anymore, cos I'm only as boobless as the actress in my favourite movie.

But why la people always make clothes for big busted women? Where's the market for people like me???

Dear Dave

2010-06-23T04:00:00.003+10:00

After 7 bloody years, I finally have the outline of Dave's physique. Dave is an imaginary person I always wrote my essays to in school. You know how for languages, they always make you write letters to someone as homework, well I wrote every single one to Dave, unless it was specifically a girl or a name was already specified. And Dave never had a face or a body. Tonight I concluded Dave's physique.

6'1" slim male caucasian. Auburn hair with medium brown eyes. I admit the last time I tried to imagine what my letter recepient looked like - about 5 years ago, he wasn't that tall, he was buffer than slim, he was Asian which meant he had black hair and dark brown eyes. But I never acknowledged that version of him cos I didn't like what I saw.

All my letters would always begin with:

Dear Dave,

Then bla bla bla I hope you are well bla bla bla.

Tortious law, here I come. Tortoise law lol.

Harsh Facts Of Life

2010-06-21T18:44:00.003+10:00

Harsh facts of life

A man loses interest in his woman.
But a woman can only love her man more and more.

Regardless how hard you try, sometimes you never get what you want.

If you don't get exactly what you want, you should learn to appreciate what you've been given.

Men have PMS too. For a few days a month, at around the same time of the month, they become emotionally unstable, withdrawn, highly irritable, rageful, etc.

Do You Believe In Magic?

2010-06-20T22:45:00.001+10:00

So I've been watching a bunch of Law and Order SVU episodes lately, and it got me thinking... How do people make lives with someone who's been a victim of some sort of nasty crime which has messed with their psychological state?

I'm no massive crime victim or expert on it, nor an expert on psychology, but people who've been victimised are often troubled no? I suppose some people get over it and others don't. I myself have never really fully gotten over my boob being grabbed. Everytime I walk by that place or even drive by there I get a rush of adrenaline, and I keep thinking of what I could have done or should have done.

But aside from the victim's point of view and feelings, how do people deal with them? How do you love and deal with someone who's got psychological issues due to having been victimised? I suppose it takes a fair amount of patience, to learn how to identify what sets them off and what to do to make things better. I assume it would take a lot of tact too. But the problem is people aren't often open about what's happened to them so its hard to know where to draw lines and to know how to tackle a breakdown.

People don't like to adopt older children, for that very one reason? They have psychological baggage and its hard to handle them? What about in the world of dating then?

I think there are two types of people, those who run cos they don't want the extra burden of dealing with someone who's troubled, and then there's those who will stay and try to bring some relief.

Do you remember the iconic picture of the girl running naked on the road away from some napalm bomb in Vietnam? I remember reading one of the interviews she gave as an adult, she said her scars always upset her and she didn't understand how her husband managed to love her. But then she said he told her that everytime he sees her scars, he loves her even more.

Don't these things blow your mind? That while some of us struggle so hard to find love cos we're picky as, others are so willing to learn to love everything about another human being.

Do you believe in magic?

On another note, WTH! I bought a parking ticket and placed it on my dashboard but it fell on the floor and so I got a parking fine. Pfft. I am so gonna contest it. Big problem is that I won't be in the country if they decide to hear the matter or speak to me to discuss it.

Z-O-M-freaking-G.

Remember school canteen day coupons?

I finished nearly 2 boxes of facial tissues (I think they're like 2 ply 200 pieces) in about a week and a half. My nose is like a freaking leaking faucet. And everytime I blow my nose, there's a squeak in my ear. Ugh.

But Its A Secret

2010-06-17T13:33:00.002+10:00

I cannot resist. Plus I'm sad sad.

I just finished my first exam paper and I have another one tmr wtf. But I'm in absolutely no mood to study now at all cos 1. I'm tired. 2. Just finish exam who want to study. 3. I didn't get to have lunch in the city which I thoroughly though I deserved after sitting for my first paper. I called like four people and nooooone of them were free to makan with me. Quite pathetic right my circle of friends? I got no one to call and the people I do call have better things to do with their lives than dine with me.

All in all I think I'm just a bit mentally drained. I studied 3/4 the entire semester's worth of today's exam in 12 hours and the remaining 1/4 I tried to study this morning but without much success. Lets see if I pass. Oh god I hope I pass.

I want to whine some more about not getting to go out for lunch today. I think if I had gotten to go for lunch I wouldn't be being such a baby about not getting to go for lunch. =( apparently I'm a bit more spontaneous than I think I am. How did I come to this? When I was little I used to plan everything meticulously and make lists to hold those plans. Well I still make lists now but not much of plans anymore. And if I do make plans, by golly gee whiz they're awesome plans. I swear I'd make an awesome boyfriend lah. I don't make that awesome a girlfriend cos in my head its like "if I have so many awesome plans I want to pull off for you, why you got none for me?" and like I said, what goes on in my head, if done for a guy, will make him feel emasculated.

Why do I keep saying I make an awesome boyfriend? Don't be weird Audrey.

When was the last time you did something sweet for your special someone?

For me, it was Monday. But its a secret.

Thanks wtf, my lunch for today is cold pizza leftover from last night still sitting in its box and propped up on my laundry bin. Ugh. Microwave is so far away... Oh noes...

Ten Stupid Things

2010-06-16T16:27:00.004+10:00

Ok right so I totally beh tahan.

You know I have limited self control.

1. I'm sick. Cough, cold, sore throat. For the first time in my life, I cannot taste anything. I have never been sick enough not to taste sweet - until now. I ate McD nuggets with sweet and sour sauce. I tasted nothing. ABSOLUTELY nothing. It was like chewing on chewing gum that you've chewed on for hours. I even licked a dollop of sauce and nothing, I tasted ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. Same went for the fried eggs I cooked and the Milo and tea and coffee and Strepsils I ate. I tasted ABSOLUTELY nothing. Fuck the lives of people who can't taste man. Its gay.

2. Speaking of Strepsils, is there such a thing as Strepsils overdose? The box said have one every two to three hours. Like zomg I've been eating them like candy sweets (when I still had the ability to taste). I googled it, seems like other people have wondered the same thing before too but nobody has much of a conclusive answer and one guy ate something like 12 Strepsils in an hour but he's still alive and well so I take the ill effects of taking too many would probably be nothing more than a slight laxative effect (but I don't know for sure either, never happened to me but I'm just assuming).

3. A lot of people swear by Clarinase or Clarityne. WHAT THE FUCK?! It doesn't work. My nose remains as clogged as it was and still leaks as much as it did. You people LIE to me.

4. I ordered 2 tops from Nike online. One is sexy the other, quite pathetic la my boobs not big enough, prolly give it to someone whose boobs bigger than mine, oh wait that's anyone else "-_- I tell you more about my boobs another day lol. And omg did you know Nike makes things/gstrings/other briefs. Loooooool damn funny la. But their xs so big I think my butt cannot fit lah.

5. I'm sick, and Bob refuses to see me cos he wants me to study (lol he thinks I study) and also because he doesn't want to get sick (aww isn't he sweet wtf). Little does he know I need human company and attention and affection to study (actually he knows I told him before but he doesn't believe me). Thus why I am always Skyping with someone when I study. I swear I'm most productive when I have like Vivien or something sitting there doing their own homework on the other end of Skype. TGF (thank god for) webcams.

6. I was so bored and overflowing with love like 15 minutes ago that I texted Joanne Chong "I love you love you love you love you love you love you love you love you" because I dunno who else to tell. Hahahhahaha. Oh and this morning I texted Kit this:

"I rurve you.

I'm bored and I'm lonely,
And I'm trying to study,
The boyfriend won't layan me,
So instead I'll disturb Zwee.

Lol but I send it to you cos I rurve you."

I couldn't find a word to rhyme with me so I wrote Zwee lol. Hahahahaha. Ok I'm losing my mind.

7. Along with my sense of taste, my sense of smell also departed from me. I realised while frying eggs that if my house was on fire, I wouldn't even know, cos I can't smell shits.

8. I fucking fucking fucking fucking want PR lor... I really really really really want it now now now now now. Cos right, with PR you have so many perks!
- You can defer semesters or years of your uni education for no reason and they will hold the place for you when you come back.
- You can underload semesters for no bloody reason which means take less credit points than international students. International student need to give good reasons, and international students pay through our noses so we don't usually want to prolong our stay here cos of the cost of living.
- You get to pay a lot lot lot less for uni fees. Highly useful for someone like me who keeps failing.

9. I'm blogging cos I was gonna explode with anxiety just now and Bob told me to take a break. And with so many non law related things going through my head, this is obviously the best way to empty it out (but actually most of it stays in my head still).

10. I dunno how I'm going to sit for exam tomorrow with my nose like that. For one, I'll be blowing my nose every 5 minutes. There'll be snotty green mucous (I couldn't resist grossing you out) tissue paper everywhere. It'll be gross, noisy and germy for the people sitting around me. And I know for a fact that its fucking annoying to sit near someone who's coughing or blowing their nose in exams. Bad enough in other circumstances, but this is a bloody 3 hour exam. Not to mention I'll be spending a lot of time blowing my nose meaning less time for exam. So uh, damn...

I love you!!!

Kit, I know you fart, I've been there when its happened. Actually I can't specifically remember a time la but I've spent too much time with you for you not to have ever farted in my presence before. Don't beat me I rurve you.

Oh one more thing. I was pouring water from a jug into a bottle with a 1.5cm diameter opening. Right before I poured it a voice in my head said "you stupid ah? Confirm spill wan lah..." and I knew without a doubt that it WOULD spill but I went and poured it anyway. Lo and behold, heeehehehehehe. Lucky I wasn't dumb enough to pour it right over my notes?

MIA Till 24th June

2010-06-12T17:07:00.002+10:00

I going MIA till 24th June. Trying to be a nerd. Last exam on 23rd.

Sorry I didn't tell you earlier.

You have no idea how damn diffucult it is for me not to jump on here every night and blog. I'm always so tempted...

I'm even trying to abstain from Facebook.

Come back on the 24th June k. I'm not abandoning you so don't abandon me!

I love you!!! Really.

Why You So Like That?

2010-06-08T22:20:00.002+10:00

I promised Bob I wouldn't talk about him on here anymore but I really just have to ask you guys this one question:

Do all your special someone's take about an hour to reply texts or is it only mine who does?

I know Sanjay replies within like 5 minutes. Its not possible to have a conversation with Joe Bubbles if she's in "another conversation" with Sanjay. If you've spent any time with her you'd know that lol.

Why you so like that?
Why you so like that?
I always give you Tic Tac,
You never give me back.

Why you so like that?
Why you so like that?
I always let you copy my homework,
You never let me copy back.

Why you so like that?
Why you so like that?
I always fast fast reply your messages,
You never fast fast reply back.

Omg ok that was so funny. That last stanza immediately came to mind without me even having to put an ounce of thought into it.

Actually, to conclude, I think everyone's special someone replies intermitently, except for Joanne and Sanjay but then again you already knew that. But those were the days when we were young and everyone replied on the spot isn't it? Now we're older d everyone's got better things to do with their life. But I admit, I often stare at my phone waiting for something to happen lol, its like Fb, I just keep refreshing my news feed sorta knowing nothings gonna happen but just hoping/waiting that something new does pop up.

I want to post some pictures of myself lah. You haven't seen my beautiful face so long d, but I have done absolutely nothing all week! I haven't gone to the city since Tramcar Restaurant lunch, oh and that peculiar night I went to Williamstown beach la but at 2am nothing's open so its not counted. All this cooping up at home better pay off ah otherwise I beat myself!

My phone was on the seat of my chair but behind my bum, and then I farted, and then I got a text. Lol. Its like magic!

Don't pretend like you don't fart lah...

Some LGMHs

2010-06-07T16:00:00.006+10:00

Every single LoveGivesMeHope (LGMH) either made me cry or stone dumbstruck in awe.

Since my boyfriend and I started dating in the 5th grade he sent me a letter every week anniversary.

We got married at the age of 23.

Today we are celebrating out 50th wedding anniversary.

I just received my 2704th letter today. His love gmh.

_________________________

Me and my boyfriend were out to dinner, there was this older couple by us. All of a sudden I heard the older man say "Remember when we were like that?" I looked at my boyfriend and we laughed and giggled.

When I turned back around, my boyfriend had a ring in his hand, and said "I can't wait till we're like that!"

Their and his love GMH

_________________________

A girl in a wheelchair who was paralyzed from the waist down was being teased by a group of boys at school one day.

They told her she would never lose her virginity or have babies.

The most popular boy in school told them to stop and asked if he could push her to her next class.

Today we have 3 beautiful children. Jacob, your acceptance GMH

_________________________

I have always been depressed.

Last night, I called my boyfriend crying, telling him that I wish he was here. We talked for six hours. When we got off the phone, I heard tapping on my window. I looked out to see him, throwing rocks. He livesin Boston, and drove six hours to come see me. His LGMH.

Except this one.

This morning, as I was about to leave for work, my boyfriend danced into the kitchen singing a made up song consisting of only my name, over and over.

When he saw me, he turned red and said "Oh, you're still here".

Sneaking a peak in the daily routine of someone who really loves me GMH.

I went mad giggling. I can just imagine it, and its so cute its funny. Even just thinking about it I'm laughing already.

And this is by far the most relatable, for me at least.

Today, I was feeling really down about myself.

I told my boyfriend how I hated my flat chest and felt ugly.

He pulled me into his arms and said, "Well I like it, Because then nothing gets in the way when I hold you."

His LGMH.

Oh shuddup its not funny.

But it makes me wonder, are these for real?

GMHs are like FMLs, I can just go on reading them for ages.

Be My Witness

2010-06-07T05:14:00.000+10:00

Excuse me, I just noticed you noticing me and I just wanted to give you notice that I noticed you too.

Say that 3 times in your head or out loud and the word notice will have momentarily lost its meaning to you.

Today, I stoned at the word simultions for about 40 seconds before I realised my lecturer meant simultaneous. Took me 40 seconds to realise the word simultions has no meaning hahahaha.

I will never understand why he broke up with me and went after you, but by god am I thankful I'm watched him cheat on you instead of you watching him cheat on me.

Thanks... Somebody wished me happy birthday 28 days after my birthday "-_-

I miss Jun-Yeu. I was looking at his profile on Fb just a while ago and after going through a few pictures of him, I realised I miss him. I can count with my 10 fingers kua how many times I've seen him since coming back to Melbourne. *mentally counting now, actually not really mentally I had to use my fingers* yep, confirm 10 times or less. Well he's got new friends now and I'm mia in Clayton anyway.

Its quite sad really, everyone has friends from uni that they actually hang out with. Even Joe Bubbles doesn't mind that all of us are abroad now cos she's got her uni buddies to hang out with. I swear swear swear swear swear I'm gonna go to uni way way wayyyyyyy more than I did this sem or last sem. I'm gonna go to uni as often as I went in the first semester of first year. No no actually even more often than that!

Be my witness.

I think somebody's doing summer school liao lah. I know its a long time from now but you better not laugh at me if I get a tan ok. I don't like it one bit. Ok la if its a nice tan you can think I'm sexy, but if its an ugly tan and makes me look like someone left cookies in the oven too long, you better not laugh. I beat you wan ah! Either I beat you or I cry, you choose la.

This Shiz Be Sweet

2010-06-06T06:06:00.001+10:00

A few of us who went to kindergarden together were talking about going back there and seeing our old teachers. I've just gone through a bunch of photos from the kindergarden's Facebook page, other than the administrators, I don't think ANYONE who was teaching there when we were attending, is still teaching there... And lets face it, we graduated 16 years ago, who's going to remember us? I know Miss Sharmani CONFIRM remember me wan. Confirm confirm confirm! I'm so sure because I was adorable back then - ok I still am but lets not get sidetracked here, and I had a motor mouth. At five I could talk till the cows came home. And of course, also because I was the one and only little red riding hood in the annual concert. Zomg I have to get that tape converted to a DVD! Joanne Chong do you still have yours?!?! I'm pretty sure Zwee's lost his already.

Turns out, I had/am having mild food poisoning. Mild by my standards cos I didn't have to be put on a drip and spend the night in the hospital. I tell you ahhhhh, motherload the last time I was in a public hospital in Melbourne, I waited four hours in the emergency waiting room puking my guts out in front of everyone. The irony is that when they finally gave me a cubicle and a bed, they put a sign on the curtain saying the curtain had to be kept closed at all times and that I was infectious. Anyone who came into my cubicle had to wear one of these.

Ironic isn't it how I had just spent the earlier four hours infecting the entire waiting room?

Nom nom nommmmmmmmm!!! I have a tendency to eat sweet things. Like, I have a little tub of strawberry jam in my room and I've had spoonfuls of it here and there while being sick. Shhhh I know kinda icky and unhealthy but its sugar and I needed the energy cos I couldn't hold much else down, ok ok sorry grossing you out.

Anyway, look what sweet things I got today XD

Well there should be a cupcake where the empty spot is but when I took the photo it was already IN MAH BELLAYYY!

But the sweetest thing is who brought them over =) sorry I'm so corny.

I think they need more icing but then again you know my threshold for sweet is ridiculously high. I'm psycho like that. If you've ever eaten the cupcakes I make, you would know I put ridiculous amounts of icing on each, unless I'm specifically making cupcakes for old people like my parents, my grandmas, or people aged above 23 years. Sorry la, but admit it, if you're above 23 or if you're Ken, you think I put too much icing on my regular cupcakes. I show you:

These are cupcakes I made with Matt early April. I think you can tell who iced which cupcakes, mine obviously sexier - and also more icing lol.

Speaking of sweet things, my cotton candy machine arrived d. Its damn hard to get the cotton candy on the paper cone while still fluffy la, but with practive I'm getting better!

The best I've done so far lol... Trust me, its harder than it looks.

I just realised the photos I've taken with my camera lately, are really crappy.

I'd Rather Be With You

2010-06-04T02:17:00.001+10:00

Yikes! I didn't know Joshua Radin was 36!!! He's born in 1974!

I love his I'd Rather Be With You! Like, brilliant much?

Eeeeeek! Dunno where to buy garter belts... Vivipary and I are talking about them. I don't know how some people wear hold ups without garter belts, I suppose they can cos they got fat legs and are tall. I want fatter legs and to be taller too =( failing which, I'll just keeping looking for them belts.

I've been feeling absolutely fucked the last few days. My stomach is going retard on me. You know Super Junior's new song Bonomana? This is Burp-o-mania. And minyak angin isn't helping. I hate the smell of it, usually my Mum rubs it on my belly for me =( I want my Mummy!!!

Gah, my mother tells me I'm supposed to be independent and look after myself =( I'm independent 350 days a year, 15 days someone take care of me lah wtfffff. Boooooooo.

Vivien's watching Sex in the City on her end of Skype and I'm listening, as if I'm watching the show as well. I dunno who but one of them had her diaphragm stuck in her and she couldn't get it out so she made one of her friends take it out for her. Haaaaaaaaahahahhaaha.

I remind you first ah. Women have XX sex chromosomes and men have XY. So kids come out what gender ah, depends on the father k, whether the father gives the X or the Y. This Vivien ah... Study bio in form 4 and form 5 forgot all this already.

The Most Onz Of Families

2010-06-01T21:50:00.001+10:00

Another vlog I follow is SHAYTARDS. He's got a bunch of other vlogs but this one is about his family. Of course no one's family is perfect but his just seems so close to it. I've never seen the kids throw tantrums but I'm sure they do, would be interesting to see how he and his wife deal with the tantrums. They only record parts of their day but even then, their family is like so cute. His relationship with his wife seems to be mad awesome, and their kids are just so precious lah.

One day, seven eight years from now. MY TURN! I think I will be a bit boh song if I get married after I turn 29, cos that's just like so close to the big three oh and I have every intention of sprouting my own mini Kohs. Mini Kohs lol.

Time to keep my pie hole shut.

Watch this clip. I particularly want you to watch the 3.00 minute mark:

and this at the 1.50 mark onwards:

So cute. And he's 30 liao and his wife 29. Hou cute ah...

Got no story to tell you today. My life hou kelam kabut, sesat sial, kusut masai.

So I was about to walk out the door and go to Williamstown alone last night but then well, the third of me thats medium smart said don't go alone so in the end I went with Irwon. I say the medium smart third cos the third that is uber smart went to sleep d and the third which even concocted the idea of going to the beach alone at 2 in the morning is obvioulsy not smart at all. There were 2 hares on the nature strip by the beach. They were cute from where I was (in the car far away from them) but animals are still scary. I wanted to go lie on the grass but that would just have been weird cos of my company.

Lunch On The Colonial Tramcar Restaurant

2010-06-01T01:53:00.001+10:00

I had lunch on the Colonial Tramcar Restaurant yesterday. Was an interesting experience. The waiters are friendly and cute (in the cute uncle kind of way), its a comfy enough ride though apparently the toilet is tiny (smallest in the southern hemisphere said the waiter). The food's not the most awesome la, its good, I've definitely had better, but of course I think you're paying more for the experience and not so much a mad awesome meal. But service is good and you can guzzle down as much alco or any other drink they stock that you want cos its pretty much all paid for, too bad I was driving and Bob was, well he's Bob, so neither of us drank any alco which was just a tad bit sad cos its like all effin paid for already.

Another thing, was all white people or tourists or white people who were tourists. Bob and I were the only not the same colour pair there so that was kinda weird and obviously invited a lot of gawking. Thanks, its always nice to know people care =)

Pictures are with Bob, I didn't take any.

Its only a good deed if you don't tell. That's true, cos if you did something and boasted about it then its not as virtuous as if would be minus the boasting. But sometimes don't you just want to beat people up for not noticing the good deed you've done? I'm not very good with that not telling part, I'm sure you can tell I like to talk. I tend to tell. I've been trying for a very long time to not tell and in the last year especially, I've been very good at not telling, I can keep my pie hole shut up till the point where the good deed recipient/recipients become obnoxious. Then I really beh tahan.

Studied with Ray tonight. Not the most productive but I definitely did more work than I'd have done if he didn't come study with me. Thanks XD

Right now at this point in time, at 1.52am, I feel like going to the seaside in Williamstown and just lie there on the grass and look at the stars. Look at the stars in awe, try to figure out which constellations are which, and just lie there on the grass surrounded by nothing. If a hare comes by, I'll try to catch it. I wish there was someone I could go with, someone who was awake right now and lived in Melbourne. You know what, I think I'm just going to go. Maybe I'll feel how I felt the last time I was there - loved.

Yes Dad, Every Guy I Talk To Is My Boyfriend

2010-05-30T00:59:00.002+10:00

Where's Jason Kon when you need him? He always gives me the kick in the butt I need. This is what procrastination does to me. I've been going through all the photo folders in my lappie and I came across this from 2 years ago lol.

(click to enlarge)

As you can see, I was trying to write a gay ass assay, pun intended.

Looooool! I found this Facebook page or something that you can like and I thought it was so cute.

Yes Dad, every guy I talk to is my boyfriend.

I remember those days. So cute, seriously. I know your dads did it too. Any boy calls the house he thinks its your boyfriend. He hears a male voice on the phone he thinks its your boyfriend. He sees you talk to a boy at school he thinks its your boyfriend. Any boy gives you a birthday present he thinks its your boyfriend.

I wanted to like that group on Facebook, but...

My Dad doesn't care anymore lah, I feel quite sad. Now my Dad is like meh...

Daddy, care lah... Its just funny to see you accuse me of having a boyfriend everytime I talk to a boy.

Now he doesn't think they're my boyfriend, now he just thinks every boy I talk to wants to get funky with me and then he wants to beat them up. That's not quite as funny as him accusing me of having a boyfriend.

Watch out Serbian.

I bought a cotton candy machine. Muahahaha. Sorry la but I'm like five... Actually I was four when I was 17 so by right I should be seven now, I should be in standard one going to primary school liao. But I kinda stopped growing at five, I think Trinity stunted my growth. Anyway cotton candayyyy. Omg I wish I still had Tommy! He'd LOVE cotton candy!

And and zomg, only AUD30 for this chocolate fountain? I wanttttt! The only thing stopping me from buying it is that I have not enough friends in Melbourne to have over to warrant me getting a chocolate fountain.

Ew. I wanted to name my kid Preston. But then I just finished stalking Elaine on Facebook and I found out she has a friend whose name is Preston and he's not so very good looking. *shudders* I need to see like five good looking Prestons from now till I have children before I can bring myself to name anything Preston.

Today I re-realised how much I don't like Leo Club. Grrrrrrr. Sorry Leos but I dontch like your club.

This afternoon I wanted to change my Fb status to something about holding hands and then tag Zwee or Kit but then I'm like $#@&*^ they both have chicks. Babiiii. Why all males I'm friends with wanna find chicks now... What about me? My imaginary boyfriend not satisfactory cos well its my imagination nia, and the real one, dunno him lah always busy no time to layan me. Got time also he dowan to layan me.

Layan meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee =( Why I haven't seen Kah Shin or Estee in so long wan? Since my birthday leh... The only communication I've had with Kah Shin since then is her screaming at me through sms to remove the picture of her, me and Estee by the pool which I put up a few days ago. Haaaaaaaaaaaaahahahhahaa. She's shy.

What A Bunch Of Cuties

2010-05-29T01:55:00.007+10:00

Omg is it wrong fo rme to love a bunch of 13-15 year old boys? Yes? But they're SO adorable and they're so cute!

Watch Connected if you want to see the extent of my indecent liking for little boys who can sing. If this band releases and album, I would TOOOOOOOTALLY buy it!

Yes Ray, its gay, shuddup, I'm a girl I'm allowed to like boy bands.

In this instance, they're literally boys!

But gg i mean seriously... They are so cute!

I'm dying, why do they only sing such a short part of the song. I need more I need to hear more from these guys!!! They need to release an album.

At times I think I picked the wrong one. I swear the world should just have more Kit Weng's. Make a few who actually ARE attracted to me and the world will be a better place. She's got the only one in 6.8 billion and she doesn't even know it.

Whenever I think of the word perfect as an adjective for describing a person, I remember that time in form 4 in the bio lab when Joanne wrong on a page in my book, "what's one word that describes you? - perfect." I rurve you Joe Bubbles. Mish you!

The last time I asked anyone that question the answer I got was "great" and then 3 months later he said he couldn't be my boyfriend cos my boobs were too small. Boobs, please? Grow? A bit more? Just a bit lah, Little bit ne... Fine. Don't. See if I care.

Went to Max B with Mian and Khei tonight. The massive catching up and girl talk concluded so many things. I absolutely love baby talk and manja-ing. Hot damn I can't live without it. I think in the future this has to be criteria for men I date, clingy and baby talk and pda friendly. Man training also is not going to work for me cos mine's too old to be trained, can't teach an old dog new tricks. Whoah, I just realised that old stood for two kinds of old. Actually you can la, but my old dog not really willing to learn much, the old boy's set in his ways. What else... Tonight we also found out that Khei Sze has gotten like 15 times more perverted than she was last October. She's even more dirty minded thatn me these days, and you all know how dirty minded I am... Khei... Rinse your brain with some soap water please! Apparently it is also forbidden for a girl to tell a boy she loves him before he tells her, and this is punishable by being beaten and bruised with cluthes and handbags and god forbid stilettos by girls and/or sissy gay guys (by sissy I mean not the macho ones la but I don't know what the correct term in, sorry). Also concluded tonight was that it is unfair that gay men are gay because they're usually damn good looking and damn nice and they know what girls like so they treat girls awesomely, only that they're not attracted to girls wtf.

Mian was telling a story about a gay couple she knows who are really cute together. Totally reminded me about the gay couple in my lectures, so cute. One day one of them walked into the lecture hall and said "hey there boyfriend" to his boyfriend (I thought he was pulling his friend's leg) but then they shared a kiss. So cute! I was sitting right behind them *perv face* heeeeeeeehehehhehehee two men kissing nommmmmm. Ok ok I stop grossing you out, but that mental picture is already in your head isn't it... Heh! Then another lecture one of them was telling his female friend that his boyfriend was making dinner or something and he couldn't wait for the lecture to end to go home to his boyfriend. I was melting. So cute.

All I put in my stomach today: a mug of milo, a mug of tea, a hug mug of Italian hot chocolate and a chocolate cinnamon babka. Wesak Day, kononnya eat vegetarian, end up eat nothing.

Whaw, I realise this post talk about little boys and gay men a lot. Please, keep your mind out of the gutter.

I have 3 parents. 2 of them actually made me, and one of them just found me and lectures me, but doesn't look after me much. Kinda like Joanne Chong but more hardcore lecturering and also different from Joanne Chong in the sense that this "other parent" does the I-told-you-to-study-its-your-own-fault-you-did-badly. At least Joanne Chong tells me off then consoles me. Hi Joanne Chong, I don't think I can chamber with you. How about you wait for me to graduate then only chamber..?

Mamak Explained

2010-05-28T01:26:00.001+10:00

Dear people whom I've tried a zillion times to explain to what mamak is (you know who you are),

Watch this zomg. This one slightly long and boring video will explain the culture of mamaking to you. Or... You can just come to Malaysia and we'll go every night =) I fkin cannot believe nobody is coming back to Malaysia with me. Ya'll disappoint me. Why get me so excited then burst my bubble? Why people why? Why? Oh yeah, Gab, I wanna go the hot springs again. Lets try not to get lost this time k? Love you! Um yeah, I got completely side tracked.

OMG I want to die. It is SO EXACTLY like how we mamak. Right down to how we fkin squeeze the limes. I want to cry right now. There's this feeling building up inside me that I can't explain. I feel like a bubble that's just about to pop! I just realised I'm actually holding my breath. I don't know why though, not like I'm gonna magically get to have some Maggi goreng or anything.

Oh dear god, bring the culture of mamak to Australia? Actually they have their own already, damn similar wan, just that they close early and instead of teh tarik or teh o ais limau they drink beer or hard liquor, instead of football (the real football, no I'm sorry its not called soccer its called football), they watch football (the weird one with Australian rules), and instead of seeing rat and having flies hovering around perpetually, its clean.

Cannot Show Armpits On Malaysian TV Lah

2010-05-27T03:15:00.005+10:00

HEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeehehehhehehehehehehhehe.

I have massive eye problems. They look so distorted.

I'll Mary your Poppins as Ben would say.

I forgot how cool the sneakers and jeans look was. Might revert.

I don't think men understand the concept and depth of wanting to do something. Ok well most men at least, of course there are the exceptions... If you've watched Jenifer Aniston's The Break Up it might make more sense. In the first part of the movie, wife made dinner for husbands family, husband didn't lift a finger, dinner's over, husband's family leaves, wife has to clean up, husband doesn't lift a finger, wife angry, wife makes a fuss, husband makes a fuss, husband doesn't want to help wife, argument ensues, husband eventually says he'll help wife, wife doesn't want his help anymore, wife wants husband to WANT to help her not feel like he has to. Did that make sense to any other than myself? Husband should love wife enough to see she needs a break and want to help her, if husband is blind and inconsiderate, at least when wife brings it up he should get that its his cue.

Guys won't know which they are cos they'll want to do everything for and do everything with and constantly be with the girl till somethings happens. I for one don't know what that something is. Its just like something goes off in their heads and they become different people.

Wanting to do something positive for someone can sometimes equal actually doing it, those are the times when its the thought that counts. But of course there are also people who are full of it and say they want to do a lot of things but never do any of them, in those instances, those people are douchbags. Actually, you can call them Kubhans. A Kubhan is a person who tells you they will do things they know you want/would like them to do, just to shut you up, but actually have no intention of ever doing it. That, is a Kubhan. Are you a Kubhan? A Kubhan can also be used to illustrate a cheating partner who tells his partner one thing and does another whilst manipulating as many people as he has to keep his partner in the dark. A Kubhan is also stupid cos a Kubhan thinks it can get away with things.

Whaw... Why all this talk about Kubhan?

Now on a completely random note... Leonard Cohen's Hallelujah?

Really? Is that called singing? Its like talking. Not even talk-singing but just plain talking. And they made a video clip really? And sounds damn like trying to be seductive I'm not sure what they were aiming for there la. But anyway, looks like Ray Romano no? Phuck the more I look at him the better looking he gets. Stop it Audrey no, old man no no. But Bruce Willis *thumbs up*.

He would have so been booted off American Idol or any modern day talent show like, withint 60 seconds.

I dunno why but I keep repeating that song, its like, the slow seductive low semi husky talking is rubbing off on me. I creep myself out sometimes. Now is one of those times.

I really didn't know actual glee clubs existed until like, well 30 seconds ago.

Joanne makes me wanna watch Nightmare on Elm Street but I know I confirm scared kau kau cannot sleep wan. Shall I waste my Sunday watching that? But need a big strong man to protect me. Big strong men? Raise your hand...?

Phuck did you know they're showing Bob the Builder - The Legend of the Golden Hammer in Cinemas in Australia? Eh Bob, wanna go?

Ok I'm sure you've seen this video somewhere before.

I don't know if you wondered, but I wondered. Why? Wtf was the Indian Aunty going on about? So I Googled it and lo and behold - the Malaysian television advertisements are not allowed to show a persons' armpits when advertising deodorants. To get around it advertisers show the model applying the deodorant from the back. Lol got that info off funnymalaysia.com but its not updated anymore. Ok I'm not sure if I was supposed to use persons' or person's but its late, I'm tired so I lazy to think and don't care.

When I'm supposed to study I come here and talk nonsense...

Tommy Boy

2010-05-26T00:54:00.002+10:00

Tommy Koko Yew Mor Onn is gone.

Actually he has been for a while la, like two weeks d kua, eh? I think three lah actually... No no two and a bit only. I mish him so much. I cried like a baby the first few days he was gone. It was so weird making dinner and not having to scream and yell at Tommy to stop hovering at my feet. Was kinda weird not having him look up at me with the most adorable look on his face waiting for me to give him some of my dinner. And the worst was going up and down the stairs without having him race me up or down.

Gosh I really miss him. Its like giving your child away or having a boyfriend move out =(

I cannot believe I let my parents force me to give him away. I NEVER listen to my parents why did I listen to them this time?

Zomg look at my babyyyy!

Heeehehe he gets terrified when I put him up on that shelf.

Thanks for the photos Bob.

On a more disgruntled note. Grrrrrrrrr. If you don't want to do something for someone, instead of beating around the bush making up excuses, and since you don't even like this person very much and have done a lot to minimise social exposure to this person, just fkin tell them you don't want to do that something for them anymore lah. Its ok to change your mind you know? But its not so ok to lie about it.

All of a sudden I feel like going to Casa Indah lol. Gah I had a few pictures of the boys swimming, can't find them now but I remember seeing them in my computer just about a week ago... Oh well, have to settle for a childrens' party.

Gg!!!

I want I want I want I want!!! That as I recall, was fkin fkin awesome fun! Throwing water balloons at small children =)

Completely seperate occasion. Zomg pool parties with water balloons. Why don't we have these anymore?

Lol even Zean was there!

Hello There Tiger

2010-05-25T02:02:00.001+10:00

Allow me to borrow just under 50 minutes of your life. Watch this episode of Hannah Montana XD

By far the most gg episode ever. Its kinda two episodes back to back but continued.

Just watch it damnit.

Drew Roy is in it!!!!!!!!

Well HELLOOOOOO there tiger *licks lips*

Cmon big boy, break me off a piece of that white chocolate. Mmmmmmmmmmmhhhhh that be some hot stuff.

I heart him more than I heart Sam Hart.

Gg! I just sprouted a mole like next to my eye. Fkin scary. And its not like a freckle its a bloody mole! Thank you sun, even though I purposely don't spend much time under you, you still want to remind me that you can kill me should you choose to right? Don't worry sun, I know that.

Downloading plugins stresses me out.

Its A Little Bit Weird

2010-05-23T23:06:00.001+10:00

This house is like the shit lor. Not really la cos the rooms are kinda shit but the photos make it look nice. Who wants to go to Byron Bayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy? Rhetorical question nobody I know would want to go.

Woots. Last night went to Il Cantuccio with Parmesh, Rosemary and Kar Men for Parmesh's birthday. Damn white kua... We were the only Asians there. Food, uh, ok kua. Not mind blasting la but their bruschetta, prolly the best I've had. Max B ftw.

"We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly." - Sam Keen, in To Love and Be Loved, from Yap Kit Weng. Love you.

There's some stiff competition going on here, there.

Its a little bit weird.

Omg so right, I recently put my Malaysian prepaid sim card into my phone and by golly, I got messages from Joanne talking about things which relate to present day. I wonder if it was sent ages ago and coincidently coresponds to present day, or if she's gone a bit mad an has been texting a phone I turn on once every 2 months...

People need to update their blogs...

Just a little sniff of you and I'll forget I have the sniffles.

Sorry but I'm getting sick of it. Are you?

Parmesh makes me want to go to Tasmania. Tasmania, here I comeeeeeeeeeeeeee (provided I find at least one person to go with). Me wants to climb mountainnnnn.

I want to watch The Last Song lor... Miley Cyrus act wan and ok you probably don't know but I LOOOOOOOve to watch Hannah Montana. I don't actually like Miley Cyrus, in fact I think she's an atrocious influence and small kids, but well being famous sucks no? And Hannah Montana just cracks me up.

Where's Your Boyfriend Dick

2010-05-21T18:32:00.001+10:00

Helloooooooooooo.

List of things I've done recently:

1. pissed one off
2. upset another one
3. and pissed off and upset another one
4. bawled my eyes out
5. finished the chocolates Ken gave me for my birthday
6. cleaned my room
7. watched an entire season and a half of Law and Order SVU
8. watched an entire season and a half of Lie to Me

List of things I should be doing:

1. not piss off or upset anyone
2. stop bawling
3. eating proper food instead of having chocolate for lunch
4. studying

Do you know why we always hurt the people we love? Cos its the same people who love us and can be hurt by us. You can't really hurt anyone who doens't give two shits about you. For the purpose of my theory I'm talking about emotionally hurt la not physically, of course you throw a stone at anyone and it'll hurt. I'm also eliminating emotional abuse la cos there's no love there.

Doesn't that mean we have to thread more carefully when it comes to people who actually mean something to us? But that then contradicts the idea what we should be able to be ourselves and be comfortable around people we love right? Agree? No?

Hello I'm a a Pokemon. Actually, I'm just a little bit sick. I haven't spoken to another human being since Wednesday. My entire human to human interaction this whole week was sitting next to Joseph in Constitutional Law lecture on Monday and Wednesday and only making some (not even a lot) of small talk with him and Joanne. That was for a total of two hours fifteen minutes this entire week. That's ALL. Ok I went to a tute on Tuesday but I sat alone at the back of the class and didn't interact with anyone except put up my hand for attendance. OMFG.

Fairy lights and really crappy music and good will to all men. Where's your boyfriend Dick? Rick. He went home to study. I love you. I love you too Dad.

Why am I transcribing what I'm watching on Lie to Me?
*yawns*

Hello.

Brrrrrr. Cold.

2010-05-20T01:33:00.001+10:00

Best of both worlds? Awesome song + country touch to it.

If Tomorrow Never Comes, still strikes a chord when I hear it. And the way this guy sings it, really jerks tears. Its like how Bob Carlisle's Butterfly Kisses definitely pulls at least a few tears every single time I hear it.

I miss watching The Nanny. The Nanny rocks sock man...

You can't make that shit up.

I didn't do it on purpose.

I need a hot chocolate fix right now!

Sorry...

Brrrrrrr. Cold.

Make Me A Sandwich

2010-05-18T18:53:00.006+10:00

Fkkkkkkkkkkkk!

This is why I wanted to be and stay Audrey Singleton this year lahhhhh.

I have a severe inability to function when I'm upset, and the only way to upset me is to put a man in my life. Thanks, now how to study? I can't tune it out either, like turn that part of my brain off. Doesn't work like that.

I fine-freaking-ally got my tshirts from Seibei.

Hooooohoooooo!!!

I bought another "Make Me A Sandwich" tee. Gab, for you, but now I look at it I dunno if you can fit in it or not... Looks a bit small.

Don't you hate it when the person you fell for isn't the same person anymore?

Right now, I really need to just jet back to Malaysia for a while, somewhere familiar, take my mind off of everything, off uni, off feeding myself, off fending for myself, off the gloomy cold weather, off showers of doom (cos when you turn the water off you want to die), off you.

I want to go to Kayu in SS2 with Joanne, and sit there and laugh like a maniac. Go to Al-Madina with Gab and whine like a baby and have Gab coo at me haha. Go to Padang Kota with Kit and talk about everything and anything and wonder why can't all men in the world be duplicates of Kit. Go to Zwee's house and, well, do nothing.

It was supposed to be easy, straighforward and pain free. Why is it getting more difficult (I'm not gonna say harder cos I know you'll think "that's what she said"), complicated and painful? If it were anyone else I'd expect a lot of heartache, I mean if I were dating Matt, I'd expect to have a lot of girls to fight off, but you were supposed to be problem free.

How do you live with someone who's life you know nothing about?

ROARRRRR! Look at my new tee!

Everyone thinks the fake bloodstains are gross, I think they should have put a bit more bloodstains on it.

Oh and I just realised within the last week, that the Perth guy - someone I was briefly affilated with while in Malaysia on summer break, ruined my chances with two other really amazing people. Well actually it was my telling them about him the messed my chances with them up la but don't count on me not to spill beans, I'm incapable of it, so onus is still on Perth guy. On the hindside, someone else found me =) sometimes I wish he hadn't, other times I wonder how he did.

This coin damn power la. Everytime I get a coin, I check the picture to see if its different from the standard ones. And if it is, I put it away. Of the 2 plus years I've been here and collecting these coins, I have never seen this one! Ever! I've seen every other design at least twice except this, and I'm always looking out for ones I don't have yet.

My 20th

2010-05-17T23:54:00.003+10:00

My 20th (8th May 2010)

Somehow I have no pictures from the lunch itself except for the cake.

Dejan made my cake.

From the entire contents of my immediate family.

My present to myself. The sexiest heater in the world.

Ken bought me chocolates, I'm still very scared to eat them cos they're so pretty.

OMFG Truffle Noire almost made me uh, opposite of go. I'm afraid to eat the raspberry one cos not only do I think its gross to eat chocolate thats mixed with fruit, of all fruits in the world, I hate raspberry.

From Shoey and Derrick.

Now I have a bunch of nice cluthes and no where to take them.

Kar Men, Rosemary and Parmesh got me a gift card and a dozen Krispy Kremes which I ate before I took pictures lol.

Shin, Estee and Emkay.

And muahahahhahhha iPod touch from Dejan.

Still pending presents from Kit and Zwee and a few others. Heeeehehehee.

On a completely seperate note, why do we humans (and I think some trained dogs also) only do things that should be habitual, when we're told to do them. Like, we should habitually put our dirty socks in the laundry but we tend to leave them wherever we take them off and only put them away when we're told to. Ok ok I know there are some of you who put your socks away all the time but I'm just giving an example lah.

Don't you hate people who don't kiss you back when you kiss them even though they're supposed to and its not like you're trying to sexually assault them or that they don't like you?

Confrontation Vs Sleeping On It

2010-05-16T20:15:00.002+10:00

Tonight I am fully unfunctional.

I said something I shouldn't have said to someone who's very dear to me.

Now I suffer the consequences.

I will sit in bed and emo nemo by myself.

Went to the new DFO in South Wharf today. Finally bought a case for my ipod, and I also got a much needed sweater from Tommy Hilfiger.

You know how some people like to confront issues, while others like to just sleep on it and wake up the next day and behave like it never happened? Dunno if they pretend it never happened or they forget about it or get over it after sleeping la, but I am certainly not that kind of person. I habis habis beh tahan wan. I wake up tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow also I will still remember and be bothered/upset about it. I suppose both are mechanisms of defence and both have their own pros and cons but gahhhhhhh. I like to fight it out, and this trait of mine does not at all make easy, communication with somone who likes to sleep on it (I'm convinced that was gramatically correct, if it wasn't, its still an artistic way or saying what I want to say).

Dear Matt

2010-05-14T04:55:00.001+10:00

Dear Matt,

No matter what you think,

I think you're absolutely positively adorable.

And I'm not going anywhere.

I Need A Cuddle Highly Badly

2010-05-13T01:11:00.002+10:00

Why are all the people I want to claim hugs from on the other side of the city or in another continent?

I need a cuddle highly badly =( Estee's not around, even if she was she wouldn't touch me. Boo hoo.

Come, sayang me, let me curl up next to you and bury my face in your chest/neck region. Wrap your arms around me and keep me safe and warm. You know who's arms are nice to be in? Your mum's! Ok I totally watch too much communitychannel. I really don't understand how its possible that I'm the only person I know who watches communitychannel when it used to always be the "Most Viewed" on the Youtube homepage. Used to be up till about a month ago when she sadly started making less videos.

I need to find more good pick up lines. I'm running out of good ones. Used them all up on Matt already. He's still not picked up.

我要在你胸口睡觉。可以吗?

Wtf Ray you have so totally sucked me into the world of writing in Chinese. Stop it!!! I have better things to do that translate nonsense into Chinese!!!

Haiyo dilemma dilemma. On one hand, I want to stick to writing my blog the way I do, minimal censorship, but somebody bising wor...

Happy yesterday-was-your-birthday Muhamad!

Peanut Butter, Banana And Bacon Sandwich

2010-05-12T01:51:00.002+10:00

Soooooo... Somewhere somehow, Estee got the idea of making a peanut butter, banana and bacon sandwich. Guess who she forced to eat it?

I know, my own birthday and I look so fugly.

Fucking gross la I tell you. Actually, it wasn't as bad as I though it would be la. Really, honestly.

Even after she put mayo and cheese on it, it still tasted ok. Not good not bad, just ok. Like edible kinda ok.

Btw I fucking hate mayo and Estee KNOWS that and she purposely put so much mayo on it. I had to wipe most of it off with a tissue, and even then when I tasted it with the extra ingredients, I gagged.

I fucking hate mayo!

Being utterly grossed out trying to chew slowly.

This is Estee going mad first trying to beat my highscore then trying to beat her own when she'd whooped my highscore on Fruit Ninja on my new iPod Touch. She was like possessed.

I think I spent like an hour reply Facebook birthday greetings. So gg. Its hard to say thanks to people you're barely acquainted to when they wish you happy birthday on Fb.

Sorry Ray! Didn't mean to change plans so suddenly. These people lah! When I ask them if they'd like to have dinner with me on my birthday they don't respond or they say no, then when I make plans with someone else they all come charging at me lol.

Ray!!! Look what I bought for you! DURIAN sweets. Want to kill yourself yet? I am SO coming by next week harrrrrrrrr!

Today I sadly did not get my Max Brenner chocolate fix. Very pei. Went there and waited at the sign that said "Please wait to be seated" yeah ok so I waited. One waiter and one waitress saw me but didn't come to greet me. Wtf? Ok so maybe they didn't see me they just looked over my shoulder right? But then they BOTH looked at me again, and I could see them hesitate before pretending they didn't see me. That does it for me man. Not fucking getting my chocolate from Max B for a while.

I fkin swear, go places with white people and you get better service. Even places I frequent, and know what their service standard is like, go with white person ding ding ding. I don't mean to sound bitter if I do but sheesh. Oh, but if you go to a white person place where most customers are white, they'll treat you the same even if you're with a white person.

I should stop talking here. Said white person too many times already feel slightly uncomfortable with myself. Hello white people I know, I love you guys. And if I don't know you, if you're nice I love you too.

You're So Khute Aren't You

2010-05-11T00:48:00.002+10:00

Hoho today I had my carpets cleaned. The guy who came to clean the carpets was Bob from KanKlean. He's damn funny and damn cute in the fat uncle kinda way. So he was telling me stories about his work and also about his family. When I told him I had to give my dog away cos my parents wouldn't let me keep him, he laughed at me, said since when do 20 year olds listen to their parents? His own 19 year old son just built his own home. Is that even possible? Is it legal for a 19 year old to buy and build his own home? Power hor. Meh at 19 we all still living under mummy daddy's roofs.

Anyway, Bob did as best a job as he could. Still some discolouration here and there but smells much better and its been sanitised so hopefully that does the trick.

I keep refreshing my Facebook page. I know nothing's going to happen and nothing's going to change but I still do I dunno why. I know it happens with a lot of you too, its a method of procrastination no?

I feel damn gg. Like very alone =(

Ah, its so nice and hot in Malaysiaaaaaa! 33 degrees Celcius this afternoon the weather forecast says. So goooooood. It was like farking 19 here. Bleh.

Lol this morning told Kit I kept refreshing my Fb even though I knew nothing was going to change just cos I was dead bored. He then proceeded to log into my account to make some changes to my "bio" section. You're sho khute aren't you. Rurve you. My hand decorated birthday present better be waiting for me when I get back for winter stompy. Will I be getting twin presents again this year?

Happy Birthday to me.

I think as a birthday present to me, Kit's upgraded the status of my boobs from mosquito bites to hornet stings. Hornet stings are apparently bigger and have a nicer shape. I bet you're wondering how Kit knows that - that my boobs are bigger and have a nicer shape, oh yeah, webcams baby, webcams. Loooool.

Story Of My Life

2010-05-08T01:06:00.000+10:00

Story of my life.

I met this guy who cooks and cleans for himself. He even irons his own clothes! And I thought to myself, "what a domesticated man! I must have him!"

At the same time, he was thinking, oh finally, a girl who can cook and clean and iron for me.

MEH. No dice baby. Shhhhh I'm talking to imaginary husband.

Any man seeking to woo me, be cautioned. Want a domestic helper? So do I. Move to goddamn Malaysia and hire one. Gotta love Malaysia.

I don't understand why boys think stupid things are funny. When you say something mean and nasty, its NOT funny. The judge's brains blowing up in the movie Law Abiding Citizen, was NOT funny at all. Some male specimens have the most ridiculous sense of humour.

I am brilliant. I've been reminding everybody about Mothers' Day and yet I forgot to send a card home. Gg!!! Oh well, that's all settled now, sexy card with a sexy poem. Only catch is that it will be one week late! Bummer...

You're Going To Have To Come With Me Sir

2010-05-07T00:59:00.000+10:00

"You're going to have to come with me sir. I need to marry you." It was the first thing that went through my mind when I saw this:

London here I comeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Where do you find these people ah Vivien... Why I cannot find here wan? Can you please export them to Melbourne? I have spare room, can take borders. With a face like that, he can board for free lah. Vivien ah whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?

Sometimes I really regret not going to UK to study. They have people like Ben Onions and the guy in the above picture.

Oh yes, and last night I watched P.S.: I Love You and bawled my muthafuckin eyes out. And the few minutes I wasn't crying I was drooling. Helloooo Gerard Butler and Jeffrey Dean Morgan. They make this kitty purrrrrrr. But like seriously, how sweet is that movie...

My next boyfriend has to be Irish. Must. So cute. With the accent and all. Loving Ronan Keating when I was 10 was a sign la.

I don't like boys/men, they're stupid. They tell you they want to see you and are looking forward to seeing you, right up until you tell them you want to see them. Then they just start going "mehhhhhh." The thrill of the chase isn't it. Keep them chasing too long they get sick of it, don't keep them chasing long enough they lose interest. How much is the perfect amount?

I think I might just revert back to having Kits, Juns and Zwees. I spend all my time with them, I never get sick of them, maybe they get a bit sick of me but they never say no do they. I love you! People who don't like you will always love you.

Three blonds are sitting at a bar masturbating when the bartender walks up to them and says "excuse me but what are you doing?" The blonds point to the sign on the wall that says "first come first served". Gg.

Goes in dry, comes out wet,
Longer its in stronger it gets,
When you take it out it starts to drip and sag,
But its not what you're thinking, its a tea bag =)

Yummy

2010-05-05T15:08:00.002+10:00

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee I feel damn single today. What shall Audrey singleton indulge in? Some yummy Aussie men? Got that right... Now if only I could get myself out of bed and to a place where I can actually find yummy Aussie men...

But at the end of the day, you will see that I do not have enough bother in me to go out to a place where I can actually find yummy Aussie men.

I'm starting to scare myself. Why did I only say Aussie men? K la we all know I'm not the biggest fan of Chinese guys but heck, I was never interested in Aussies before, ever. Cos they're so... White... Times and taste change yeah? No lah, its like what Kah Shin and Estee will lie about. When we see a not so good looking guy, I will blatantly express my thoughts to Kah Shin and Estee, and they in turn will scold me and lie and say that its their heart that counts? Really? Really?

K la that's true la. It really is the heart that counts.

I am at present, filled with displeasure because my texts are falling on deaf ears/blind eyes/immobile hands.

Help Me Get This Corset On

2010-05-05T01:42:00.001+10:00

Cultural differences - they bother me.

When you're a fast texter, 2 minutes is too long to wait for a reply. Tis a Facebook group. Tis true. And I type at lightning speed.

Looks like this year I'll be doing the Redang thing without a man. Hence, Joanne, you're not allowed to bring Sanjay. Sorry, rules of the game. And actually since I got nobody to show Redang to, if you really want we can go to Tioman Island instead (zomgwtf Tioman *shudders*). I mean if you really really rather give Redang - the 10th most beautiful island in the world, a miss, and go to Tioman instead, hey, I say lets do it. But feels wrong man... Having been to Redang the last three Julys and then abandoning Redang for Tioman *shudders*.

Lol Kit never fails to make me giggle like a psycho when I Skype with him. Heart you. Make me feel so much better about being where I am, about everything.

Today I discovered that corsets weren't really meant to be put on without help. You NEED someone to help you put it on. Because it squeezes the life out of you and its hard to squeeze more life out of yourself and hook them corset hooks if you've already got most of the life squeezed out of you and can't breathe. Either ways I pull it off. Keep you banger in your pants its not lingerie, these a decent corsets that act as tube tops.

I give up. Gonna cancel my birthday party. Its not supposed to cause me more stress than enjoyment.

Mothers' Day is coming soon people don't forget!

Wonderbuddy

2010-05-04T02:09:00.001+10:00

Maybe I don't understand the magnitude of the decisions God has put in my hands.

Omgwtf why so I sound so Christian. Gg! Like, no kidding, seriously, the God reference makes me feel damn gg!

I've tried rephrasing it to something like "maybe I don't understand the magnitude of the decisions that are in my hands" but it just sounds wrong, like its my fault I have these decisions to make. But thats intolerable and its not my fault so I have to blame someone and who better to blame than the non-existant all hailing fictional God.

Don't need to beat me or antagonise with me, we're all entitled to our own beliefs.

Wahhhhh my party is stressing me more than anything. RSVPs are what's stressing me la. I dunno how much food to prepare. Egad! Lol I forgot who asked me "who says egad?"

I love how when I feel happy, like happy from the depths of my soul, I can stand being outdoors without having to wear much. But I think it also has to do with how well fed I am. Because last night I had a mad massive dinner and then proceeded to wander the 10 degree Celcius streets of Melbourne with no jacket, just a long sleeved shirt, while my wanderbuddy (lol like wonderbuddy and he is a wonderbuddy) was wrapped up in 3 layers and bundled in a scarf. Thanks for coming out with me. Come lah lets go get hammered on Thursday night!

But on shit days, say when I get up on the wrong side of the bed, or when I'm upset, I feel cold through and through. To the extent of wearing long johns in 22 degree Celcius weather and still feeling chilly. And I just realised, so far this year, I've been able to withstand the cold much better, either its my tolerance for the cold growing, or its how busy I'm keeping myself by having fun day in day out. Either ways, I love the feeling of warmth that comes from right inside me, cos no matter how many layers I wear or how hot I turn the heater on, if I'm not in a positive mood, the chill won't go away.

I'll make my own rosie posie. Hop to it skippy. We'll have buckets and buckets of fun. More at home in one place than another. Pokemonnnnnn. Maybe baby. Popo shut us down, don't stop make it pop. Secrets - they ruin lives. You've got chocolate on your chin, oh wait, that's a mole. Holey moley! I've got mandarins in my cheeks. By golly that's a mouldy looking stain. Wankerrrrrr. I'll tell you if you tell me first. An itch that would be inappropriate to scratch.

Ah fuck, I'm thinking about when Matt's cousin come to pick Tommy up and I'm crying like a little baby. Maybe I'll buy another dog next year, one that's trained already? But I love Tommy to bits! Its not the same! Its not that I want a dog I want Tommy boy!!! ='(

Hey You

2010-05-03T01:34:00.001+10:00

Hey You,

By letting you into my life,
do you feel like you know me?

By giving you my secrets,
do you feel more, or less free?

By showing you who I am,
do you like what you see?

By sharing with you my thoughts,
do yours sync with mine?

By telling you my feelings,
have yours changed with time?

By not being yours, for me,
does your heart pine?

One day, another day, maybe,
our feelings will intertwine.

Seatbelt Buckle Belt

2010-05-01T04:53:00.000+10:00

Love love. Them boys put smiles on my faces. What you said about who I call SLUT! put a smile on my face =)

Matty B you LIE! Everyday tell me not going clubbing till after exams then you still go! Broken your promise twice d! Gg lah you! Beat you ah!

Fuck my life. Have made white person fall in love with the Wonder Girls. &$#%. Sigh. What is the world coming to?

Baby.

Joanne Pereira knocks sense into people. She like talk then suddenly inside your brain got lightbulb on wan (wah sibeh broken man my English over there, lol and over here also) even though you didn't know inside your brain even got lightbulb.

Confirm with you white people like to say lah lor cos they think its very funny, like how foreigners in Australia like to say "g'day mate!"

My feet very cold.

Aiyoooooo. People are taking much too long to RSVP and confirm their attendance to my birthday la. Frus tau... Its like, my cake isn't going to make itself the day of the party based on how many people turn up. Very frustrating, seriously, like a big bunch of planning and preparation and now its damn anticlimactic. Gahhhhhhh!

I can predict the future. I'm going to lose a man and in the process, lose another. Can't always have what we want right? At least I still have my imagination. That's where imaginary boyfriend steps in.

Package collected. Satisfactory fit.

Estee tells me if I think my birthday is a Chinese wedding I can go ahead and change my outfit mid way lol.
I give up. I really really give up.

Oh I very clever. Everyday say I want to buy a sleeve for my laptop. I've had the little fucker for over 2 years liao and its still naked. Talk about procrastination.

Ooooo so fun. Get a boyfriend you can dress up. Today I damn free, was browing Asos website all day. Oh btw, free shipping again to Australia and Singapore. Fkin gay man they need to stop telling me.

Anyway, so cute! I was browsing the men's accessories category, yes shopping for my imaginary boyfriend, and I found the cutest belt ever. Ok its kinda tacky la but its still cute!

Like airplane seatbelt like that!!

And I also found this supercool bag. I don't know what's so great about it, just that its Eastpak and fully functional. In my mind I just want to put my lappie and other nonsense in it and board a plane lah. Does it look Redang appropriate?

See can roll some more wan, with its telescope handle.

Today is damn cos I'm not shitting with you. I want to die liao. Its so cold tonight that I'm wearing socks. I hate wearing socks. They're restrictive and they make my feet sweat. I'd wear gloves too if I remembered which box I put them in. I still haven't unpacked properly yet lol.

Don't think its going to work out. For reasons that are becoming so clear now.

Sexy V Ugly Cupcakes

2010-04-30T01:23:00.002+10:00

Sigh, had to edit this on request. Baked cupcakes with a good friend a few weeks ago. Obviously said friend did a lousy job with the icing. Mine are the sexy ones. Duh.

I Call ____!

2010-04-28T22:59:00.001+10:00

I terlook at her face again on Facebook.

I call SLUT!

Tommy's Hugs

2010-04-28T21:57:00.006+10:00

I love it when Tommy hugs me.

I have a tendency to sit on the floor and have my lappie on my bed. Tommy comes up to my side, stand up, puts his front paws on my shoulder and looks at my face and then at the screen, and he makes that side he's standing on feel warm, like a real hug. I'm gonna miss the little boy.

He's just yawning lah I'm not squeezing him to death.

Had dinner with Joe, Leanda, Ronald and Estee in Palms Foodcourt tonight. They have AUD4 thosai!!! I love love love love love thosai! RM12 for thosai is kinda gay la but better than AUD9 roti canai right? But thosai is the shiz la. Anyway was great company, especially since we're all doing law cept Estee. Gah feel so smart, having dinner with other law students lol!

Other than dinner, today has been majorly unproductive. Some people say its too cold to leave their house so they don't go out. I say, its too cold to leave my doona so I'll stay in bed all day. Was in bed all freaking day, pretty much right till Estee came home. Spot. I'm so excited, something arrived for me and its waiting to be picked up from the post office. Whoop de doo.

Did you know you have to bring your passport as proof of identity when picking up parcels. I know its procedure and all but I think its fucking stupid. They don't even record any details from it like your passport number or anything, or keep a copy of it for their record. They just look at the name and the picture and then your face and then just give you your package and passport. WTF. I've got my student card, Malaysian Driving License, Malaysian IC with my gorgeous face on it, and you want me to drive all the fucking way home to get my passport just so you can LOOK AT IT and give it back to me.

The lady behind the counter damn bitch. She made me go home to get my passport. The umpteen times I've collected all other packages, they've been satisfied with any other identification I've shown them. Maybe cos I'm a pretty girl and all other times the person behind the counter was a man. Its the hair, I swear. Instant sex appeal. Go perm yours and make it wavy. Even guys who have stated they like girls with straight hair, can still fall for me wan. Oh stop laughing at my ego. Bad day today, need ego boost ok.

Thanks... White person teaching me Chinese. I know I know, I'm a disgrace to Chinese people.

As I mentioned earlier, I tend to sit on the floor with my lappie on the bed, and I also mentioned it was cold today. My arse is warm. I'm sitting on my laptop charger's adaptor thingy. Heeeeeehehe.

I'm trying to make Tommy lie on my feet to keep them warm but he won't. He insists on lying one foot behind me and looking at me instead of actually being useful to me by being a feet warmer.

Everytime I see her face, I call SLUTTTTTTTTT! And her face just appeared in someone's photo on Facebook and I feel this urge to call SLUT! Only Vivien knows who I'm talking about. And Kah Shin and Estee always say her name just to annoy me. But really, I call SLUT! I'd love to show you who she is. I call SLUT! Has previously tried to steal 2 of my boyfriends and also another friend's boy. Good night New York. I mean Melbourne.

Raaaarrrrrrrr!

2010-04-28T03:16:00.000+10:00

RAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

I feel like you guys have been MIA for so long d. Zwee I think disappear into the realm of couplehood. No time for me liao.

Roar baby roar roar.

Godssss I miss you two so much!

Who else in the world would draw such inspiring pictures of me?

You think you very talented now ah Zwee?

My epic favourite. You will see this picture again and again and again and again.

This is what happens when you're deprived of exposure to Kit for prolonged periods of time:

Woots you remember what happened that night? Merry Christmas lah.

Tiny eyes.

Heart.

This one dunno eat until like how wan...

I seriously need to spend some time with you two! And Joe Bubbles. Joanne, did you know that people who read my blog who don't personally know you, refer to you as Joe?

Junnie Boo. Where are you? You also damn MIA. Lol I was gonna scold you about not having seen my house yet then I realised you have been once for the bbq.

Bare My Soul

2010-04-27T03:39:00.004+10:00

This is gonna be a whiny ass post with a sprinkle of emoness. You are welcome to disregard this post as one of those where I talk to myself because sometimes we just need to talk to ourselves.

Remember when I told you that you should always listen to your mother. I really regret not listening to mine.

Mummy told me this is not a good year to get serious with anyone. Mummy said that there will be a lot of guys in my life this year but they will all just come and go so I cannot waste my time and emotions on them. Duh me, stubborn as I am, didn't listen to her. I've had guys coming after me left right and center since December (since winter solstice passed la), most of them I didn't even know liked me (call me stupid) and there's one really big regret there I think we all know who he is. Then I made the mistake of being suckered into falling for someone. In my defence I really couldn't help it lah he's so perfect. But lo and motherfucking behold (lol yes Ray I know you want to hear me say that out loud), my little heart breaks.

After Kubhan, my Dad was crushed to see how broken I was. And for different reasons, even my Dad said to just casually date and not see anyone seriously.

Why don't I ever listen to my parents? Why?

I want the carefree Audrey back. The one who doesn't give a flying fuck.

This stupid annoying feeling of wanting to be with this one person all the time. FUCK IT! Its so annoying really. Need to go for mamakkk! Need to go to Chawannnn! Need to get away from all this for a while. Fml. Need my life back. Kind of want it back, yet kinda don't. I know that makes sense.

Shu Zhi always told me to enjoy single life, at first I didn't believe her, and then, I did. Not feeling like you have to give two shits for another human being rocked more than I expected. A bit too late to thread down that road now though. Well not really. I'm hungry. Like mad hungry.

I wonder why I bother shaving my legs when I have hairy arms. What's the point? If people are already grossed out by my hairy arms, my smooth hairless legs aren't gonna make a difference. And if they see my legs first, when they see my arms they'll still get grossed out. Why so I bother? Don't ask me to shave my arm hair. I don't have that much time on my hands.

So anyway, I used a new razor and killed my right calf. It was bleeding like a motherfucker. Shut up lah don't laugh at me. You know me lah, no reason to shave my legs before the most recent few weeks ma. So I've forgotten how sharp a new razor can be.

I feel like he doesn't want me to like him that much. I was in Kubhan's shoes and its a good place to be, you feel like you have control. But now I feel like those shoes have been taken off my feet and put onto his. And I'm left barefooted and vulnerable to all the sharp glass, rusted nails and dirt in this alley. I should write books.

Everyday there's this shitting retarded children's music or some kind of retarded music that plays outside my house. I don't know what the fuck its supposed to be or where in hell it comes from but holy crap its annoying. Thank god it only goes on for 2 minutes at most.

My happy face with my new bear bear Toby.

I fucking love Westlife.

Gah. Its like how he used to buy flowers for you and bring you cupcakes when you were hungry, ask profusely when the next time wass that he could see you and then holding on to you so tightly when he got to see you, holding your hand and smelling your hair. How he used to. Does how he feel for you also change, or is it just how he behaves?

Vivien, <3

I'm eating garlic bread. Tastes really odd on wholemeal bread what more Burgen. I put a lot of garlic butter spread on my bread. When I say a lot I mean so much that Khei Sze gets scared. Anybody dare to kiss me and my garlic bread breath?

Unfuckingbelieveable how I managed to have lunch with Ray on Anzac Day with him all dressed up in his suit with his medals and all but totally forgot to take a picture with him. Gah.

Yay! Early birthday presents! If I'm not wrong I think these are my second presents for my 20th. Slippers form Joanne were the first. I have a feeling like between the slippers and these, I've gotten something else from someone but I can't quite remember what or from who. Sorry.

A box.

Of mad colour pencils! OMFG!

Its like so fucking sick I don't know what to do with them! I'm filled with a need to colour something sick but I can't, I don't know how to colour, I don't know how to shade, I don't know how to draw anything that I can colour in. Vivien is mad jealous. She wants to smack me cos you get me things you know I like without me even asking. How ironic it is now, to reflect on the nights I'd scream and yell "I fucking hate you Vivien" at Vivipary over Skype while she gloated away about JS. Bring him to Malaysia please. I want to meet him and we can all go to Redang together. Redang Redang oh Redang Redang.

What does this look like?:

Hehe its a moo moo cow. Too cute notebook I don't think I can bring myself to use, ever.

I don't know what you think, I don't know what you want.

You won't hold my hand and you won't kiss me, unless I hold your hand first or I kiss you first. I kinda give up. Can you make up your mind please? I don't have time to play these games with you

Mothers' Day is coming soon. Sweetness? Meh... Rach, I've taken care of it on all our behalfs. Not going to tell you what I'm doing though, just in the tiny case Mother is reading.

That one paragraph in your second post gives me goosebumps. I'm somewhat amazed that that could and even would come out of you. I didn't smile when I read it, it just touched me in some way, I can't describe.

Can you feel this magin in the air, it must've been the way you kissed me.

I bet this post is confusing a lot of people and confusing for a lot of people. Don't say I didn't warn you, I feel like I'm talking to myself, hence I know exactly what I'm talking about. But I'm not really trying to make sure you can follow my train of thought, and if you think my other posts have no train of thought, those I've ALREADY made a point to put in a sensible order.

Attend Footy Match - Check

2010-04-25T01:25:00.000+10:00

Dating old people is tough shit. Not kidding. Worse still I think when they're white. Not only do they have that many more years worth of habits and quirks, their whiteness means its a whole other world's kind of habits and quirks. That, takes some tough ass getting used to. Am I ready to take this task on - the understanding era differences and cultural differences if not putting up with it?

Old but Malaysian, still can deal with (I say Malaysian cos you all also know for me Indians Chinese all same same wan, all Malaysian nia no cultural difference). Young but white, still can deal with. But whaaaaaa, other than that, multiply the headache by 2 la.

Hello I'm Mary Poppins.

On Ray's suggestion, now resorting to getting a Blackberry on ebay then paying 20 bucks extra on my phone plan to use the Blackberry features like bbm and email. But doubt it will work, bids and bidding are a bitch. Trying to work my way around having to pay anything for the phone lol.

Tell me, please, leave comments. Can be anonymous, nobody will know who you are, and trust me can, nobody cares.

How do you text/im/email a kiss to someone? Dunno about you la but I'm Malaysian, I do the "muak" or "muakk" obviously double k means more onz la the kiss. So tell me, do you muak, mwah, muah, or have your own word for it. Tell tell tell tell tell. I swear I need to know. I have an argument to win. But don't need to be biased just because you love me and want me to win, I need to know how YOU do it.

Somehow I have a feeling only Gabryel will leave a comment. Eh. Help me out lah readers...

I went to the footy today. Melbourne Demons won Brisbane Lions by uh, about 50-ish la. Wasn't really paying attention. If I wasn't having to constantly play peekaboo with the head in front of me I'd definitely have enjoyed it more. Loved the atmosphere though, everyone was so enthusiastic and all. Oh but minus the uncles sitting close by who were yelling so loudy I was going deaf in one year.

At least having been here almost two and a half years, I can say I've been to a footy match. Sheesh, now I feel obliged to go watch cricket also but its arse boring la. Like no chikek at all.

I still don't understand why some people think some things that aren't funny, are funny. I mean if its true and its a positive thing then ok la say la, I'm guilty of that. But if its not funny that someone's not the sharpest tool in the shed, and its the truth, but its not a positive thing, then don't bloody say it lah. But Mr B. What I say is true and POSITIVE!

Censorship. Hello contradiction.

Happy Birthday Joanne

2010-04-23T04:23:00.003+10:00

Dear Joe Bubbles,

Happy 20th. I love you. I'd say more than you can imagine but I figure you know me so well you probably can imagine.

I miss you freaking heaps. Like more than heaps, mountains. Actually, I think there's a possibility that you miss me more these days... Might I suggest you get a fucking Blackberry so that we can IM? You will never be lonely again. I will haunt you and spam you with messages all because I can, and cos it'll be free.

God only knows what I'd be without you. I couldn't even begin to guess where or who I'd be if I didn't have you and that secky smile in my life. But I do know that I'd be dreadfully listless about life if I didn't have you to turn to. You keep me out of trouble and keep me in the games I need to be in. I'm only able to get back up each time I fall, to regain my footing each time I stumble, to swim to the surface and catch a breath before I'm sucked back under - because you tell me I can. And if I can't, you pick me up when I fall, you catch me when I stumble, you pull me out of the water for a breath.

Happy Birthday Love.

I'm sad and embarrassed to admit that somehow, Joanne and I don't take many pictures together. We both know this, and we try to take more pictures together, but someone always gets in the way...

These were ALL that I could find that looked remotely decent. I was gonna narrow em down to a few but I realised that all of them have something to show about our friendship.

Who the nuts asked me to kiss her? LiYin was it?

Same cheesy smile, curly hair, grey top with black print on the left side, black buttsuckingly fitting bottoms. Difference? One's fattttt and one's skinnnnnnay. Indian? What Indian? Where?

Did I forget to mention excessive head tilting to the right as a similarity?

Oops wrong Joanne.

Tis what happens when I don't have a boyfriend and need a hand to hold - she holds mine.

Hi brown hair black eyebrows my dear...

Hooooo SPM, still feels like yesterday. So excited about Sejarah for what?

Right right... The excessive head tilting to the right. I told you!

While going through every picture I've got on my lappie and on Facebook, I realised one thing, LiYin always chjor teng in pictures of Joanne and me. Like I said, someone always gets in the way.

Hello there Li Yin #1.

Hello there LiYin #2.

Hello there LiYin #3.

Hello there LiYin#4.

And... Sorry LiYin but I really have to crop you out of this one for future use.

Happy Birthday Saiko. Heart you very much.

Sorry, just couldn't resist. Its alright, sometimes, its ok to let the inner nerd come out to play.

I didn't bold any words cos I couldn't choose which words to bold. I wanted to bold them all cos every word was of equally high importance.

Hey You

2010-04-22T15:52:00.002+10:00

Hey You,

He came on to me,
said he wanted something to happen.

I resisted.

He persisted.

Then when I start to fall for him,
start to let him into my life.

He throws that one line in my face,
a gorgeous stab of his knife.

Holy shit I'm full of Hey You's lately. Excessive amounts of strings of words in my brain trying to get out. Stop it brain, churn out some useful law sentences not these useless ones please.

I wish I was back home in Msia with you Kit. We'd go mamak hopping and talk, and talk, and talk late into the night and early into the next morning. Fill the little spaces in each others lives with love, sup kambing, teh o ais limau, teh ais, thosai, and Maggi goreng. Oh sweet sweet Maggi goreng, how I love and miss you so dearly.

Just kiss her sweetheart. Trust me can? I'm a girl.

I Hope To God That's Batman

2010-04-22T01:42:00.001+10:00

When you get used to something happening, lets say a daily greeting, a weekly visit, a monthly postcard, a yearly birthday parcel, that one time it doesn't come - breaks you.

Birthday birthday birthday! Yay yay yay! Why am I so excited, Joanne's birthday ain't even passed yet. Do you know what you're getting me? No? WELL START THINKING!

Sigh... No packages from Malaysia this year =( Didn't even get any cards last year! So pathetic meh? Come on lah you Malaysians currently residing in the mother land can do better than that right??? Thanks ah Joanne... I'll be getting your card in December is it? Lol.

Don't judge me. I'm not five, I just behave that way sometimes.

So now I've got my camera back but I ain't doing anything with my life. Other than stay home and watch How I Met Your Mother or Desperate Housewives or think about the sad and nearing departure of Tommy. My baby. Little baby. Little baby baby boy is going away. Matt's cousin is taking him in. Babyyyyyyyy. Ah fuck, now I feel like crying d. My little baby ='(

Omg the more I think about it the more upset I get and the more I feel like I can't live without him. He's the only one I see on a daily basis. Everyone else I see once or twice a week at most... And he provides me heaps of company, seeing I live out in the middle of nowhere and don't see human faces sometimes for 6 days at a time.

Girls get puppies to replace boyfriends. Does that mean I should replace my puppy with a boyfriend?

FML I don't want Tommy to go ='(

Don't want to leave you with my emo nemoness. People in charge of taking away my bad feelings and giving me happy ones are all not online and instead of making me feel better, one just broke my little heart. Well not really, just made me very annoyed.

Heheheeeeeeeeehehhehe.

Only I can play things by ear and see how things go. You (in a very accusational tone). CANNOT.

Hmph!

Wanted: Uni Friends

2010-04-21T01:27:00.000+10:00

Behold, I realise how pathetic my life is. The Melbourne life at least.

I have friends from primary school, secondary school and college whom I hang out with.

And then there are those friends I only see one on one or see when they're with their friends because I'm weird and I don't mind meeting up with people and their friends even though I don't know their friends.

But...

I don't have any uni friends.

Well ok I do, but all I do is go to classes with them. They're not the kind of friends I hang out with, party with, go to dinner with, study with (though a lot of the time I wish I'd be included), they just all seem to have a click already, one which I seem to not be included in. I must attempt to change that. Cos its just sad, to be in uni and not have uni friends. Uni is supposed to be when you make your contacts and befriend the people you potentially marry. But nope, ain't got too many uni friends here. I should probably go to uni more often.

Having multiple oral sex partners can lead to oral cancer - throat cancer, mouth cancer or both. I'm not gonna link you to any sites with articles on it so google it yourself. I'm just saying... Be careful. Use a condom. Every. Time. Straight men who want to stay safe in turn should use dams. Be a man, invest. You can easily buy them online, I'm just saying. Don't ask me how I know. I do a lot of research before I tell you things cos I don't like lying to you and so that at least when I give you a problem, I can give you the correct solution. Cos this isn't primary school maths where you'll get it right after a few tries.

Aren't I thoughtful?