Omg.com

James Morrison and Nate Berkus equals omg.com.

Omg I had my hair cut and now its so effing short wtf. Now my hair's not even long enough to cover my boobs. Stupid stupid, I said two inches TWO only NOT four! Grrrrrr.

So short?

Everytime I have anything done to my hair, I'm amused by the fact that they all speak to me in Mandarin or Cantonese and I always answer in English. Haha super lame.

Shampoo boys are much more gentle than shampoo girls. Its not gender biased its just so true cos when they're blow drying your hair, they take more care not to burn you by blocking the hot air with their hands. Girls, just burn your scalp with no care. True story.

On another note, here's me mucking about in the Triton. Omg I love the truck.

I know, I need to get a life. I'm looking for one.

Malacca Trip

Malacca Trip (4th December 2009)

aka

I Know That We'll Have A Ball because we knew we were going to have a ball.


Lots of camwhoring occured.

Zwee.

Zwee sat in front but didn't do too good a job keeping me entertained while I drove. Lousy front seat passenger. No wonder Kit always sits in front when I drive with you two.

Malaysian style.

The car far left has made his own lane. And the car far right is on two lanes. Its stupid how the roads in Malaysia are wider than in Melbourne, and the cars here are smaller than the cars in Melbourne, yet Malaysian drivers manage to be fucked up enough to drive on two lanes and never use their signal wtf. I fucking hate driving in Malaysia.


First stop was a coffee shop in Kampung Lapan.

Superb duck noodles! Best I've ever had, but then again duck noodles is not a common find. Sad part is they didn't have ducks gizzard or ducks feet for me =( boohoo. Shall go again and make sure I get my gizzard. Oh what lovely cholesterol filled delicacies.

Duck noodles!

Joe Bubbles.

Ninja Zwee.

Shin, Joe, Emkay.

Next stop, Cheng Hoon Teng temple on Jalan Tokong (Temple Street).

It apparently is the oldest functioning temple in Malaysia. Heaps of restoration has taken place over the years but it still takes its old shape.

Emkay posing with a beca (trishaw) haha so funny.

I actually think they're really ugly when they're all done up and colourful. I like them plain and old school, like how they were when they were actually used as a mode of transport and not like now where only tourists ride them. Trishaws are sexier naked.


Off to lunch venue #2. Chicken rice balls.

We totally joked that they shaped the rice balls using armpits. Its quite possible but I don't think they'd come out too round, more likely a lil ovalish and flattish haha.

Me and Shin Shin.

Emkay bought a lottery ticket while waiting and won air.

Behold, chicken rice spheres and chicken.

Twas really crowded.


Off we went to Dataran Pahlawan and A Famosa.

Gods I drove heaps. And our lovely back seat passengers made heaps of conversation without me. Thanks lah.

Sleeping, posing, sleeping.

I bitched a bunch that nobody took any pictures of me so Joe Bubbles did her best to include me haha.

They told her not to pose too extravagantly...

But then I went and did this...

Oh shoot me why am I such a boy.

I'll love you forever and ever and ever and ever.

With Zwee Hohohohohoho! <3

I like this picture only that we're standing a lil too far apart.



Next we were off to dinner. Satay celup in Capitol.

Although the sauce was really good, I was quite disappointed with their limited variety. I was thrilled though that they had pigs ears, haven't had pigs ears in ages. But how could they have had pigs ears without also serving pigs stomach. Boo boo. Now I must go wat Bak Kut Teh to have cholesterol laden pigs stomach.

Not. Joanne's. Cuppa.

At. All. Haha.

Tried to get dessert at Tan Kim Hock but we only managed to find our way to the branch which didn't serve dessert blehhhhhh. Otherwise we would've had cendol d omg. But we got dodol anyway.

And then we went home.

Of Flat Marbles

I don't do this often, blog about what I purchased, but I'm bored out of my wits.

I went to a Japanese shop where everything was Rm5 and bought a bunch of useless things.

The most usless purchase would have to be the flat marbles. Hehehe. Well not totally useless...

It spells Elaine if you're blind...

I bought:
- like a small cooler bag thingy
- a pair of cupboard door hooks
- two Japanese rice bowl containers with lids
- a pie dish
- a A5 sized plastic file
- an mascara brush
- a "compact hair cutter"
- flat marbles
- a small basket

And then I went to Borders and bought two books. I love Kevin Brooks's books! Lucas is the best book in the whole wide world, and March by Geraldine Brooks is a close second. And no they're not related.


And both me and the little one also bought a dress each. Well mine's a shirt but no prizes for guessing that I won't be wearing it as one.

The world ends tonight.

Big big fight with *clears throat*. Like reallllllly big. I believe I have been wronged. And *clears throat also believes *clears throat* has been wronged. Bollocks. Not in a good mood. But I won't take you down with me.

My little sister's description of how I look from the back. "You're like chopsticks with a boingy butt." Stupid chopsticks. Why would anyone want legs like mine?! Need. Fatter. Legs.

Tonight I went mamak hopping with Kit. I love you Kit! Everyone else is being so home-body-ish that the boy who's in the middle of exams has to take time off studying to attend to me? Cmon people don't let Kit take time off studies to do something YOU can easily do! And you'll KNOW who you are cos I'd have been texting you a million times a day asking you to waste your life away in my company!

All my love to you faithful readers who still read this blog. Sayang all of you.

Sayang = love in Malay

Oh yeah, on the flight back I came across these articles, totally forgot about em. For people who don't know what the durian fruit and teh tarik / mamak are. Hopefully they explain it better than I do or ever will.

Click to enlarge.

Click to enlarge.

Click to enlarge.

Stephen Cheng Weds Lew Mun Wai

Stephen Cheng Weds Lew Mun Wai (29th November 2009)


Emkay invited me and the girls to her sister's wedding dinner. It was a first for all of us attending a wedding without our parents. Muahahaha I drove us there and got us moderately lost somewhere in the realms of the city centre. Lovely.

The newlyweds!

Omg went I saw the bride I almost died. She was sooooo gorgeous! And hubby is cute too. Watching them walk down the aisle made me sooooo wanna get married too! Their's is the sweetest love story but thats not for me to divulge here.

Bride's sister and groom's brother as bridesmaid and best man #2. Groom's brother, cute much? Yes, very.

And thus begins the spamming of camwhore photos. Please be patient with us, we were all dressed up and when we are (even when we're not) we're overly enthusiastic about being in and taking photographs. We're Asian, sue us. Oh wait, you can't!

Our table, missing a few people though.

Mua's and Joe Bubbles.

Shin and Estee.

Halfway through dinner we disappeared to the foyer to take photos XD

Please don't tell me my dress was inappropriately short or that I need a tan. Pointing out the obvious has never been a positive trait.

I look like a peacock and only Emkay had the guts to pose like that. Even I was chook.

Joanne, Audrey, Emkay, Estee and Kah Shin. Emkay originally wanted to stand on the piano chair! Haha!

Look at this Joanne, she thinks she's too good to pose for photos pfft!

Burple purple pineapples!

She's claimes to not be homophobic, yet she won't let anyone touch her. Look at how she's struggling when Emkay's trying to annoy her by pretending to try to kiss her?

Just crop the rest of us out, Emkay looks like a princess!

Soz lah I spoilt the photo hahaha.

Hehehe we stayed till the very end and were one of the last to leave. We had nothing better to do lah. Hahaha we stole roses, well Emkay did then she gave em to us.

Attempts were made to take a photo with the rose cos the colour so totally matched my dress. I'm not sure to laugh or cry at this very sad attempt. The objective was to take a pretty picture, the outcome is a good laugh.


So I decided this would be smarter:

A perfect match. Now where's mine?

First Of December Again Mehhhh?

I know who I'm going to marry edi. Him:




Its like omgwtfbbq. Why does everyone love men with British accents? *droooooooools*

or him:


Guys can want to marry her but she's a pornstar lah so uh, think twice?



Oh shit shit shit <3 I'm melting into a puddle!

Sigh, today's the first of December. How did so many other days slip right through my mind such that sometimes I don't even have a clue what the date is, and yet I have to remember today. I shall kidnap him for lunch if possible.

Being back in Msia has a bit of a downside to it lah. Just a teeny tiny bit. That everywhere I go, memories flood back, especially when I'm alone, and boy oh boy does everyone leave me alone heaps. Hello people! I need attention? Stop going to uni and layan me can? I want to go out out out! I do not enjoy being at home doing nothing!!!

I Love Being Home!

Touchdown much?

Can't trust anyone to do an Audrey's job. All the photos taken since I arrived are absolute shit. Sigh much. What nuggets.

I love home. I love love love love love home.

I LOVE BEING HOME!

There is fresh apple juice and a hot breakfast waiting for me when I wake up every morning/afternoon.

Hot damn. I realise that everytime I am back, I fall in love with my bathroom all over again. Oh what a bathroom.

Updates soon, waiting on some photos.

I'm in Malaysia bitch!

Have you ever experienced being so awestuck by something that you forget to breathe?

Well tonight for the first time I can recall, I did. I went to watch a Brazillian guitar duet by Paulo Bellinati and Christina Azuma at KLPAC (Kuala Lumpur Performing Arts Centre) with Yew Weng and was just blown away by the first few pieces. Shall not bore you with the details of which pieces. Anyway, it was like all of a sudden I realised I'd been holding my subconsciously holding my breath! I've never been to a purely instrumental performance cos, well, I almost hate instrumental music but well I went anyway and it has set a good impression.

In the car on the way home from KLPAC, I was telling Yew Weng how its more than likely that in a few years time my little sister will out-pretty me and he said "are you sure thats possible? You're pretty hard to top you know?" Awwww I love you but... Hahaha suck up! But I know he means it XD cos if he didn't, it'd be OFF WITH HIS BALLS!!!


I made a cake today... Those super simple log cakes with cookies and cream. I put it in the fridge to set before I left for KLPAC and when I got home, this is how it looked...


This little monster ate it:


Looks like a boy with ugly long hair right? Its actually a girl with ugly long hair. And thats the face she makes after I yell at her. I forget what it was about though, but no it wasn't for eating my cake. I made it for her anyway, just didn't think she's eat it without me!


Dragging her to the hairdresser's soon. I would normally say I cannot stand being seen in public with something with hair like that, but I shall not be mean and so I won't say it, I'll only tell you I wanted to say it.

Missing one sister. Where are you? Come home and see how fat your dog has become!

What Will This Summer Bring Me?

Hahaha I'm reading My Dad is a Fob and I am this <-1cm-> close to pissing my pants.

#1 [While driving with my dad, someone cuts us off]
Dad: Fart the horn! Peter, fart it!

#2 Dad [while typing an e-mail]: How do you spell purple? P-U-P-P-O right?

Fob is an abbreviation for "fresh off the boat". Like, new immigrants etc wtv I don't care its an insult. Well these days we fly. Pretty annoying when people regard me as an fob, cos like, I didn't get here on a boat and like, fuck, my English is better than half the people who regard me as an fob. Membabi sial.

Membabi = to be a pig
Sial = wretched
Membabi sial = to be a wretched pig (with implied reference to the target insultee)
I'm sleepy, I dunno what I'm saying.

When I go back to Malaysia, I wonder if I'll be missed. I wonder if they'll miss me. I wonder if Tommy will miss me. I wonder if you readers will miss me.

I know I always MIA when I'm back in Malaysia and then resurface when I'm back in Melb, but this summer hopefully I have to balls not to abandon you lah. Sif anyone even reads this blog when I'm in Malaysia?

I'll be gone for 3 months. Sounds like a long time when said like that but confirm it'll be over in a blink of an eye, and I'll be left at the end of the 3 months wondering where the fuck did my summer go and start my whole "do I really have to go back to Melbourne? Please Mummy don't make me go. Please Daddy I want to stay here. I don't want to go back there, there's nothing there for me in Melbourne. I have no friends in Melbourne pleaseeeeeeeee I don't wanna gooooooo" And then cry before we leave for the airport when the make me go anyway.

Maybe, just maybe though, next year will be different. Maybe, just maybe, there might be something worth looking forward to in Melbourne (like doing first year law again wtf). Only time will tell I suppose, and until then, I probably still have to go through the whole "phuleeeeeeeease don't make me go back there" shit.

I'm starting to like Melboure a bit more these days though. But after being in Msia for 3 months, oh motherload I KNOW I will be a whiny bitch about coming back here. It doesn't end with me being flown back to Melbourne. The bitch whining has had a pattern of continuing after I touch down in Melb.

When I arrive in Melbourne what will I do? Spend the first 3 weeks going "I want to go home Mummy please? Please. I really don't want to be here. I want to go home Daddy please *starts sobbing* there's nothing for me here and I can save you a lot of money if I study in Malaysia please Daddyyyyyyy!!!" only to be told to shut up and suck it up cos I'll be home in a few month. Fuck those "few" months are agonising.